Views From The Armchair

"Views From The `Footiemad` Armchair
Diary Of A Season January 2005

Saturday 1st January 2005
"Somebody else round everyone else. You're watching your back like you can't relax. You're trying to be cool you look like a fool to me." (Song)
Complicated - Avril Lavigne: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins and Kirstymd

Middlesbrough star Doriva is an international for which nation?
Brazil: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Happy New Year to one and all! For the third year in a row, we did manage to stay up and see 2005 in, although it was tough going as I'd been up since 3:30am the previous morning. It was helped somewhat my us and some friends spending the afternoon at the local panto, performed superbly as always by the FAOS (Frome Amatuer Operatic Society). Whilst these locals performances don't `boast` name stars who once had a bit part in a reality TV show, they do put the emphasis on family entertainment and audience participation and four of our seven strong group were `involved` in one way or another. As we were in the front row, our friend Karen was `picked out` and had to do a few seconds of ballroom dancing with a member of the cast, whilst her daughter got more than a passing mention due to the party dress that she was wearing. Our daughter was asked to take part in a vote as to whether the villan (King Rat) or the good guy (Dick Whittington) was voted off in a terrific parody of Big Brother, whilst I was the subject of considerable banter from the leading dame who also happens to come into the shop where I work. He mentioned to the 500+ audience that his "Paper Boy" was in the front row and later stated that he hoped, "his paper wasn't delivered late in the morning!". Great entertainment though and as much a part of Christmas and New Year as the present giving.

New Year but same old story in the Prem, at least as regards recent games anyway. The topical trio at the top of Chelsea, Arsenal and Man United all had tricky away matches today and all at different kick off times, however whilst it didn't go smoothly in any of the games, all three came away with three points. Chelsea's win at Anfield came late and amid controversy after the home side had two first half penalty appeals rejected. The Gunners then went ahead at Charlton and only clinched the win after an equaliser from the hosts put them level at the break. United won well at Middlesbrough, but again survived a good second half spell of possesion from Boro, even if chances were limited. With Everton losing...no, hammered, at Spurs, it would seem that whilst fourth place is very much up from grabs, the top three look unlikely to change, apart from among each other.

Sunday 2nd January 2005
"I know from the outside, we looked good for each other. Felt things were going wrong when you didn't like my mother." (Song)
No Regrets - Robbie Williams: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

In 1937-38, which club were relegated from the top flight despite boasting a `plus` goal difference (80 scored to 77 conceded)?
Man City: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

No Prem games on the box today which seemed strange for a Sunday, so when my wife suggested a shopping trip to Bristol after I'd finished work, I didn't refuse as it would have to be done at a later time, probably when football WAS on. Whilst at the out-of-town shopping area at Cribbs Causeway, two things struck me as being strange. Firstly, whilst queueing with my daughter at Burger King, it surprised me how many people order a `double` this or `whopper` that and, as part of their meal deal, they order a DIET coke! What you gain with one, you lose with the other I suppose! Similarly, whilst grocery shopping in Morrisons, the lady on the till next to us had a wide and varied selection of sweets, crisps and chocolate (mind you, so did we!!) but again an equally varied array of Diet drinks. Maybe they were for different members of her family....?

Whilst Xmas and New Year telly has been nothing special this year, I did look forward to, and enjoy, the Xmas Day episode of The Vicar Of Dibley and it was with some delight that I found out that another new episode was on last night. To the BBC's credit, they somehow managed to do what, to the best of my knowledge, no other broadcaster has ever done before and turn a 40-minute sitcom into an elongated Charity Appeal. At first, I thought the Live Aid/African Famine mentions were part of the plot, however as they were mentioned continually throughout, both my wife and I commented on it and to end the programme with what was a heart-wrenching piece of film (Thinnly disguised as part of the plot!) of two very upset African orphans confirmed our thoughts. Even at the end, we had a phone number in case we wanted more details or `If we had been affected by the ending....` etc. Now, I don't want to pretend that it isn't a very worthy cause and that these kids are in desperate need of help because they are, however there are two problems here. Firstly, the great British public only have so much spare cash to give to charities and that many of us tend to stick with those that are close to our hearts and secondly, the awful events regarding the tsunami in the Far East has currently concentrated many charity givers on that and away from other causes. I sincerely hope that this was a one off attempt and, as my wife pointed out, may be something to do with Dibley star Dawn French being married to one of the main African Famine Appealers Lenny Henry, however if the Beeb and others continue such ploys, watch the ratings fall! Imagine EastEnders being puncuated by a plot line about Ian Beale appealing for help for Charity X!! Worthy causes yes, but please stick to dedicated ads and appeals rather than plots in comedy shows.

Monday 3rd January 2005
"Believe me, I'd prefer not to. I may be synthetic but I'm not stupid." (Film)
Aliens: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd and Kirstymd

Which manager signed James Beattie for Southampton from Blackburn?
Dave Jones: Correctly answered (eventually!) by Helen Lloyd and Matt Robbins

Southampton boss Harry Redknapp must be rubbing his hands in delight this morning, not so much that he's lost a striker in the shape of James Beattie, but more due to the fact that he'll have some cash to spend in the transfer window this month, although in truth, a lack of readies has never stopped him in the past! Everton look likely to be the side splashing out a reported �6.5m for Beattie's services, but is he really the 20+ goal a season man that they need to keep up their good start to the campaign, a start which has been built on a strong defence. Beattie's overall record prior to this season reads 65 goals in 197 games, an average of around one in three which isn't that bad, but seems a bit low for the price tag about to be paid. Everton are not a bad side, indeed you don't reach fourth place by the halfway stage by luck alone, but whether Beattie will warrant his transfer fee remains to be seen. I have my doubts personally.

With four games in nine days over Christmas and New Year, most fans would be thrilled with nine points from those matches and this particular Leeds fan is no different. Indeed, had that been offered on Boxing Day, I'd have been clambering over women and children to bite oiff the offering hand! Somewhat ironically, the one game that I thought we'd win - at home to Crewe - was ultimately the one that we failed to win but that simply sums up the sheer unpredictability, not only of Leeds, but of football in general. The fact that we've had two red cards in the last two games is a little worrying, as are the number of bookings being collected, however we are nicely in mid table with a decent cushion away from the relegation zone and, dare I say, an outside chance of a play off spot. Suddenly things are a little brighter now than nine days ago.

Tuesday 4th January 2005
"Though I respect that a lot. I'd be fired if that were my job. After killing Jason off and countless screaming Argonauts." (Song)
Birdhouse In Your Soul - They Might Be Giants: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Which manager left Newcastle in 1992 and took over the same position at West Brom shortly afterwards?
Ossie Ardiles: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

It was the kiss of death really and Sods Law took full advantage. No goalless draw in 84 years and the two clubs with the worst defensive records in the Prem up against each other, so there simply had to be goals....didn't there? Well, sadly no as West Brom and Newcastle fought out a 0-0 draw at the Hawthorns last night in an encounter that rarely looked like providing a goalfest. But that's the way things are isn't it as more than once this season I've mentioned about low expectations before watching a game only to be pleasantly surprised. Now, dare I mention that tonight's televised fare is between two of the Prem's most in form clubs as Man United host Spurs. It should be a cracker....shouldn't it?

Anyone who picked up the Daily Mirror today would surely have noticed a common these running throughout. Indeed, it began on the front page with a third of the cover taken up with the fact that a token for a free bar of Cadburys Dairy Milk was inside. That was all well and good as there were no strings attached and so on, however as it's apparently the 100th birthday of either Cadburys or the Dairy Milk bar (maybe both?), then Cadburys have clearly paid the Mirror a lot of dosh for the privilage of advertising this as, over the 64 pages in the paper today, there are ads for CDM on 17 of them - that's over 25% of the pages have ads for the SAME PRODUCT, ranging in size from full page to quarter page. Maybe it'll have the desired effect but I found myself ignoring them all eventually.

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Wednesday 5th January 2005
"Now Greg, you have a very unique last name and Jack and I were wondering how to pronounce it?" (Film)
Meet The Parents: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

In 1980, Spurs won 1-0 away to Man United in an FA Cup 3rd Rd replay. Which current Championship manager had to go in goal for Spurs after their regular keeper was injured during the game?
Glenn Hoddle: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Following last night's games, we should be talking about Man United and Arsenal dropping points at home whilst Chelsea continue their surge to the title. However, as always, behind the results is something more and at Old Trafford we had a sensational goal that wasn't given, despite the ball being feet over the line. Yes, Pedro Mendes` remarkable 45-yard lob, Roy Carroll's fumble and subsequent recovery and the officials waving `play off` will be the talk of pubs and bulletin boards for days, however having seen it a few times, it's worth looking at both sides of the argument. Firstly, it was 100% definately a goal - no arguments about that, but due to the sheer length of the shot which was almost at the halfway line, the officials simply weren't up with play and couldn't see clearly enough that the ball was in. This was emphasised at the final whistle by the reaction of the Spurs players, or lack of it, as there were few, if any, recriminations or finger pointing at the ref or his assistant. On the other side of the coin, the ball clearly bounced over the line and should have been seen and it's worth looking at the replay and watch Carroll when he hooks the ball out as it actually bounces on the line AFTER he's clawed it back out again, a pretty good indication that it was in! A call for video replays with doubtless be back on the cards again and whilst I'm in favour in situations like this, I wouldn't be for every throw-in or goal kick decision of even offsides. Let face it, if any one decision is responsible for these being brought in, it could well be this one. Now, having looked at it with an unbiased eye and tried to see both sides of the problem, the bottom line remains that it was an incredibly poor decision from the officials and if Spurs miss out on Europe by two points or United sneak the title by one, how the fingers of blame with point then!

Okay, crap decisions aside, what a great evening it was for Chelsea. They had their game against Middlesbrough wrapped up by the time United kicked off, whilst across London, Arsenal stuttered and spluttered at home to Man City, only rescuing a point thanks to a late Freddie Ljungberg header. What all this means is that Chelsea now have a seven point cushion over the Gunners and a further four over Man United and that it would take some collapse from Mourinho's side and something dramatic from the two red machines to overhaul the lead and whilst we've seen it happen before in the Premiership, you do seriously wonder about the probability this time. Admittedly, Chelsea are surely going to drop points eventually, but they can currently afford to lose two games and still remain top and to be fair, they don't look like losing any, let alone two.

Thursday 6th January 2005
"And we can carry on making mud pies and picking our noses." (Film)
Tooth: Correctly answered by Kirstymd

Liam Rosenior played ten games on loan last season at which West country based club?
Torquay :Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

On the face of it, last night's televised game between Southampton and Fulham had all the appeal of paddling in the mud at Weston Super Mare, however the words `book`, `cover` and `judge` spring to mind as two relegation threatened clubs treated us to a cracker. Among the six goals shared were terrific finishes from Kevin Phillips and Thomasz Radzinski and we also witnessed one of the more powerful strikes at goal this week, although sadly for Liam Rosenior, it was past his own goalkeeper! But this was Premiership football at it's entertaining best. The cynics will claim poor defending and bad mistakes, I would counteract with edge of the seat excitement and the result in doubt until the final whistle. As for the bigger picture and whether either will avoid the drop, well that remains to be seen, but on last night's showing, they both have a decent chance.

Those who have Sky TV will doubtless know of the free magazine that they send each month which whilst detailing many of the forthcoming events on Sky for the next month, usually remains untouched and unloved in the plastic wrapper at our house until such time that we tear it open ready to take to the recycling bins. However, something caught my eye...well ear actually...during the football at the weekend and having found the new Sky mag, I discovered that it's back!!! Yes, series four of `24` hits the screens on the 30th of this month and having watched series/day three religiously last year and then, thanks to the wonder of DVD and Ebay, series/days one and two during the autumn, I can state that I'm really looking forward to this - and this coming from someone who NEVER watches much on TV unless it involves twenty two trying to kick a ball over a white line only to have the `goal` ruled out. But, to get back to the point, apparently series/day four still stars Keifer Sutherland but most of the other regulars have gone, although anyone who saw three will know that many of them wouldn't have had the option to return anyway!! So, Sunday nights are never going to be the same again as the cats will be out of the catflap, the dogs will be on the landing and the phone off the hook from 9pm.

Friday 7th January 2005
"It was a flight on the wings of a young girls dreams, that flew too far away." (Song)
China In Your Hands - T`Pau: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Who was the last player to score in every round (3rd to Final) of the FA Cup in one season?
Peter Osgood (Chelsea 1970):Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

One of the most potentially exciting weekend's of the footballing year kicks off tonight as the FA Cup third round is upon us. I was asked at work today who I thought would win it (perm any one of Arsenal, Chelsea or Man United!) and my bet for an outside possibilty and, as I said, all knock out cup competitions are so hard to predict this early due to the luck of the draw. For example, if Man United draw Liverpool and Chelsea face Arsenal in round four (assuming they all get there of course!), then that's two of the four favourites out. Similarly, if a mid-table side gets favourable home draws throughout, they could well reach the semi's with a minimum of fuss and publicity. However, as part of my agenda to look a fool as regards predictions are concerned, I'm plumping for a semi-final line up of Man United, Liverpool, Chelsea and, as an `outside` bet, Middlesbrough. Apologies to fans of all those four clubs.

I've never quite taken to Big Brother and any of the various `spin offs` that Channel 4 and Co have managed to come up with, so the new Celebrity Big Brother has hardly had me reaching for the remote control, except to switch channels. You see, it's been well documented this time around that C4 have had trouble getting `names` into the house with a couple pulling out at the last minute apparently, so we're left with the likes of John McCrirrick, Caprice, Germaine Greer and some guy from Blazin` Squad who I'd never heard of. Basically a cross section of people who aren't so much in the `Where are they now?` files, but more in the `Who Were They Anyway?` drawer. Still, I daresay that one of the blokes will bare his bum or Sly Stallone's ex will whip her top off and it'll be hailed as the best thing since the sandwich toaster.

Saturday 8th January 2005
"I've played all my cards and that's what you've done too. Nothing more to say, no more ace to play." (Song)
The Winner Takes It All - Abba: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Which top flight club did Yeovil famously knock out of the FA Cup in 1948-49?

FA Cup 3rd Rd weekend always provides a story or two and whilst certain other clubs deserve a mention - and will get one - for knocking out higher leagued opposition today, I have to mention Exeter City first. The non-leaguers were given little hope with an away trip to Old Trafford, however they rubbed the cliches (Enjoy the day, don't freeze) into everyone's faces and gave as good at they got, ultimately coming away with a remarkable goalless draw! The replay in Devon is likely to be televised and will earn the Grecians some much needed extra cash, however I have a feeling that United will walk it by three goals in truth. Now, go on Exeter and prove me wrong again!

Full marks also to the likes of Sheffield United who saw off Aston Villa in the early kick off, aided by a second goal which was absolutely miles offside, however take a peek at the linesman and you'll see that he's not even looking at the receiving player when the ball is helped on! It hasn't been a good week for officials eh! Prem opposition also fell at Boundary Park where Oldham beat Man City on a gale force of an afternoon and at The Stadium of Light where Palace were beaten by Sunderland. Less of a shock was Norwich losing at West Ham

Finally, special mentions to Yeovil who beat Championship strugglers Rotherham 3-0 away from home, Scunthorpe who actually led at Chelsea for 18 minutes before class told, although by all accounts, it was never a stroll, and to Cardiff and Watford, both of whom held Prem opponents in the shape of Blackburn and Fulham.

Sunday 9th January 2005
"I've done some things in my life I'm not proud of, but this is the first time I've ever felt in real danger of hell." (Film)
The Green Mile: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

After non-league Sutton beat top flight Coventry in 1989, which club then scored eight against Sutton in the fourth round?
Norwich: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

For around 50 minutes of playing time today, it actually looked possible rather than likely that a fairy tale would happen and that Yeading could `do an Exeter` and get something against Newcastle today. Indeed, despite Newcastle always looking the more likely to score, the non-leaguers did come within a superb save of taking the lead in the first half. Ultimately, the back pages tomorrow will be of galantry rather than a record book re-writting victory, although Yeading will not easily be forgotten as they certainly had no intention of giving their Premiership rivals an easy ride and this was a very good starting XI that Newcastle fielded as well, unlike the mis-mash that Man United started with yesterday. So Yeading can hold their heads up high and return to the non-league scene whilst Newcastle can thank their lucky stars that the finger of fate didn't point at them today.

I wonder what bright spark at Sky or the Beeb did the scheduling for today's games? Whilst Sky had the Old Firm game kicking off at 12:15pm, the aforementioned Yeading-Newcastle match began at 13:45ko, giving around a twenty minute overlap at the end of the first and the start of the second. I would suspect that many people, myself included, who started with the Celtic v Rangers clash did finish watching it and if they didn't, they probably missed John Hartson's winner in the 77th minute which had me rocketing out of the chair whilst the dog wondered quite what had happened. Two good games today, shame we can't say the same about the scheduling.

Monday 10th January 2005
"Tell me about the ocean moving in slow motion. I see it glitter in the sun, then it's freezing in the moonlight." (Song)
All The Things She Said - Simple Minds: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Who was manager of Portsmouth immediately before Harry Redknapp took over?
Graham Rix:Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

As usual, the FA Cup draw threw up some interesting games and it's notable again that the `Big Three` were all presented with home matches, assuming Man United get through of course. Equally noticable was that the outstanding tie of the round doesn't involve any of the top three as it's undoubtedly the South Coast derby as Southampton host Portsmouth. This would be a big enough game anyway, however with the Redknapp/Smith factor very much at the forefront of everyone's minds, it simply adds to the fascination and it's a surefire game to be televised. Both Redknapp and Milan Mandaric have said after the draw that there is no animosity on either side and that's pretty much what you'd expect, however I wonder if the hoards of travelling Pompey fans will be quite as accomodating!

At the end of last week, the BBC had received a record number of complaints over one programme as in excess of 45,000 gripes were received regarding the screening of Jerry Springer - The Opera. The biggest irony was that this figure had been reached BEFORE the show had actually been aired as many had heard about the 3,500+ swear words and apparently blasphemic scenes that were part of the show. This was never more evident when I caught a piece on Sky News about protesters outside BBC Broacasting House and an interview with one particularly vocal young woman who, when asked if she'd actually seen the show, she replied, "No!" and then proceeded to return to her high-horse and continue with her protests. In a nutshell, we have the cruz of the problem as people are quick nowadays to whine about hype and, if anything, that probably increased viewing figures for the show and then afterwards, more complaints from people who knew what to expect, but were still offended. As for me, I used that miracle of modern technology know as the remote control and after Sea Of Souls had finished on BBC1, I didn't bother to switch channels. Easy really.

Tuesday 11th January 2005
"This is the life we chose, the life we lead. And there is only one guarantee: none of us will see heaven." (Film)
Road To Perdition: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Who were the last winners of the league cup during it's sponsorship era with the milk marketing board?
Oxford (1986):Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

With the FA Cup still fresh in our minds, it's the time for the Carling Cup to take over as the semi finals first legs take place this midweek. Watford are undoubtedly the outsiders as they face Liverpool at Anfield tonight, whilst Chelsea and Man United do battle at Stamford Bridge tomorrow. So far, Chelsea, Man Utd and Liverpool have fielded starting line ups in this competition which have not been full strength and whilst the argument for and against that has been worn out over the years, it'll be interesting to see what happens at this stage. Liverpool will be anxious to avoid the proverbial banana skin, whilst usually Chelsea and Man United could field reserve sides capable of beating anyone except Exeter perhaps! So, will Mourinho or Ferguson risk a below strength squad? Will they both field reserves teams or take a chance and send the big boys out? One thing is certain, if you were a fringe player who had played in each previous round, you'd be pretty peeved at being left out now!

Working in a newsagents has certain advantages, notably that I have the chance to glance at most national papers and read anything that takes my eye. It's also noticable that each New Year, the publishers bend over backwards to `win` new readers with a variety of `offers` and freebies, ranging from extra bits in the weekend papers (as if they aren't already heavy enough) to offers that look too good to be true. Take the Express last Saturday who proudly stated that they had 100,000 FREE DVD players to give away to readers. Each day since, 50% of their front page has been taken up with this wonderful offer, however having read the details on Saturday, there's a different perspective. Yes, it is a free DVD player, but to get it, you have to get 45 different daily tokens printed in the paper before March 8th, and four have to be Sunday tokens, making a minimum cost of �20.80p (41 days at 40p and four at �1.10). That's assuming no price increases and no Saturday papers brought at 70p! But it gets better! You see, if MORE than 100,000 apply, then only the first 100,000 drawn at random get the player, leaving others who have collected the vouchers DVD-less. The last time I looked, you could get a DVD player for under �30 in the shops with no hassle, no waiting and no cutting vouchers out of papers.

Wednesday 12th January 2005
"If all you've got to prove today is your innocence. Calm down, you're as guilty as can be." (Song)
Road Rage - Catatonia: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

In 82-83, Watford managed their highest ever league finish - second (behind Liverpool). Who was their leading scorer that season with a superb 27 league goals?
Luther Blissett:Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

It's often difficult to judge what a `good result` is after the first leg on any cup competition. Is any sort of win a `good result`? Or is a goalless draw away from home worthy of celebration? That conundrum could easily be used after Liverpool beat Watford 1-0 last night as the Championship based visitors will certainly be pleased not to have had three or four put past them, whilst Liverpool are likely to be happy just to take an advantage away to Vicarage Road in a fortnight. In truth, the result could have] been so different as Liverpool were given a lesson in the first half and only really perked up when Milan Baros came on as sub. Prior to that, their lack of quality strikers was more than evident and they can be grateful that Baros recovered from his injury in time to at least play half an hour. So regardless of how you define a `good result` and regardless of whether you think the scorer was Steven Gerrard (as I do) or a Neil Cox own goal, the second leg is set up perfectly.

Isn't it odd how weird things sometimes happen at the oddest time and place which really makes you think if unseen forces are working somewhere around you. Before this turns into a prelude to an X-Files episode, let me explain. We deliver papers to a block of self-contained old peoples flats and although each residence is seperate, the main front door is kept permanently locked and can only be opened remotely from inside or via a code number tapped into a keypad outside. As we need to get in daily, we are privvy to the code and I had to use it myself today as the usual papergirl was off sick. So having got in, delivered the papers and locked the door again as I went out, I happened to glance across the road at a car parked directly opposite the block (although whether it had anything to do with it or any of the residents, I really don't know). The number plate of the car contained just three numbers between four letters (as is the norm with slightly older cars) and the three digits were an exact replica of the code needed to get into the building! Same digits, same order and all together. Okay, so it was probably a wacky coincidence...or was it?!?!

Thursday 13th January 2005
"I remember all the nights I used to stay at home. On the phone, all night long." (Song)
Its Okay - Atomic Kitten: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

During the 80s, two penalties were missed in league cup finals. Who were the two players responsible?

At around 9:30pm last night, with Chelsea and Man United battling out a goalless draw, I was given a rude awakening by my wife who threw a packet of our daughter's school pencil's at me! My crime was falling asleep on the remarkably comfy sofa whilst `watching` the football! In truth, it wasn't because it was a poor game despite the lack of goals and what I can remember watching I certainly enjoyed. I guess the combination of a long day and a comfy sofa...I guess we've all done it! So, which club can be judged as favourites now? Probably United just as, although they've not got an away goal, any sort of win in the home second leg will do it for them and continue an astonishing sequence of never having lost a domestic semi final under Sir Alex. Indeed their last loss was thirty years ago. Chelsea aren't down and out though as any scoring draw would send them through, albeit after extra time, and their record at Old Trafford is pretty good. It should be a cracker and I might even stay awake for this one!

Working directly with the general public makes you open your eyes as to how picky some people can be and the `British Way` of keeping a dignified silence is rapidly going out of the window. As an example, we were in a queue at Waterstone's a couple of weeks ago and my wife and daughter overheard a conversation between a male customer and one of the assistant at the shop. In short, he wanted a refund on the book that he'd bought on a previous visit. Now, apparently Waterstone's have a tight policy on refunds, as have most large stores, so why did he want one? Was the book damaged? Was page 254 torn and unreadable? Nope, he simply didn't enjoy reading it and wanted his money back!! Now, correct if I'm wrong, but when you buy a book, you pays yer money and takes yer chance and as one man's meat is another man's poison, no book is going to be universally liked by everyone. That's the risk you take when buying! I'm an avid reader and enjoy the likes of Ian Rankin, James Patterson, James Herbert, Mark Billingham and Karin Slaughter among others and whilst I enjoy most books from these author(ess)s, there are a few that I've read once and probably wouldn't pick up again. That's a way of life! Thankfully Waterstones stood their ground and refused a refund on those terms, but what if they had and it was extended elsewhere? Next time you go to the cinema or rent a DVD, ask for a refund if you didn't enjoy the film! The industry wouldn't need to worry about piracy, it would be dead within a month! Bottom line, if you don't enjoy a book and want another instead, join the library!

Friday 14th January 2005
"Even through the darkest phase. Be it thick or thin. Always someone marches brave. Here beneath my skin." (Song)
Constant Craving - kd lang: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Thomas Gravesen joined Everton from which German club?

Almost midway through the transfer window and it's been fairly quiet aside from the odd high profile striker moving from Real Madrid to Liverpool. Today however sees a whole batch of `names` seemingly on their way to pastures new as Real Madrid (yes, them again) look set to sign Thomas Gravesen from Everton, Robbie Savage looks likely to get his way and move to Blackburn, whilst Birmingham are also looking to offload Dwight Yorke. Add to that a potentially explosive move along the south coast for Nigel Quashie (Portsmouth to Southampton!) and you have an interesting line up. Whilst the Savage move is no surprise having treated his club like crap after signing a new mega-bucks deal just a few months ago, the one likely to have the biggest impact may be Gravesen leaving Everton. The Dane has been superb for them this season and is one of the reasons that they hold their current lofty position. Now I don't know whether they have to sell him for financial reasons, but this could be a major own goal on their part.

Saturday 15th January 2005
"I don't tip because society says I have to. Alright, I tip when somebody really deserves a tip. If they put forth an effort, I'll give them something extra. But I mean, this tipping automatically, that's for the birds. As far as I'm concerned they're just doing their job." (Film)
Reservoir Dogs: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

In the 1966 World Cup, final hero Geoff Hurst only played in the three knock out games. Who played in the three group matches and was eventually replaced by Hurst?

Records made at Anfield today as Man United won at Liverpool for the third season in a row, the first time that they've ever achieved that and United are now in a club record equalling run of seven clean sheets. Wayne Rooney's goal, courtesy of another error by keeper Jerzy Dudek, was enough to do the damage, however more damage could have been done by his celebration as he did `The Ears` in front on 15,000 Liverpool fans on the Kop. Whilst I can totally understand what he was thinking, the actually need to carry the actions out shows immaturity in the least. He had no need to run toward that end to celebrate, he could have done the same� in midfield or celebrated with the bench, but he clearly knew what he wanted to do with few thoughts of potential consequences. Footballers seem to think that they are immune whilst on the pitch to any physical abuse from fans and that should be the case, however if goaded, it only needs one lunatic fan to get onto the >pitch, again with no thoughts of consequences, and the outcome could be serious. Remember Ian Walker season for example? Finally on this point, a question. What's potentially more serious - Celebrating a la Rooney by goading directly in front of the fans who've already been giving you verbal abuse or removing your shirt after scoring a goal? Oh, and which is the bookable offence....?

So with United having won the early kick off, the pressure was suddenly on Arsenal and Chelsea to perform in tricky away games as well, with differing outcomes. Chelsea continued their surge towards their first title in 50 years with a decent 2-0 win at in-form Spurs, however two hours later, the final whistle blew at the Reebok to signal Arsenal's third league defeat of the season, all of which have been in the North-West, Bolton the victors this time. Put all of this together and you have a very healthy looking ten point lead for Chelsea (eleven over United) and although they still have to play both of their nearest rivals, this would now be a major slip up if Mourinho's side fail to win the league now. Villan of the day award goes to Portsmouth who had two players red carded as they lost at home to Blackburn, however with Norwich, Southampton and Palace all losing, it gives West Brom a massive incentive away at Fulham tomorrow, although I don't fancy their chances too much to be honest.

Sunday 16th January 2005
"A smile like the cartoon, tooth for a tooth. You said that irony was the shackles of youth." (Song)
Whats The Frequency Kenneth - REM: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Scottish side St Johnstone are actually based in which city?

Well, I was right about not fancying West Brom at Fulham today, however only in scoreline as the baggies did everything they needed to do except score. I can recall five decent chances for West Brom with Rob Earnshaw and Kevin Campbell the main culprits, however as is often said, you need to take advantage when you are doing well or be punished and that's precisely what happened. A stoppage time winner against you is bad enough at the best of times, but having dominating the game only to lose to such a soft goal in so much that Bouba Diop was left totally unmarked, is hard to take and you really felt for the travelling West Brom fans at the end. I fear that they'll be relegated well before the season ends, however if they do ultimately go down by just a couple of points, this game will certainly be one that they'll look back on.

Prior to the relegation battle came the Champions League battle as two hopefuls - Middlesbrough and Everton - met at the Riverside. Again, one side had by far the better of things and again they ended up going behind, however luckily enough for Everton, they had plenty of time to recover and, unlike West Brom, did just that with a second half equaliser. There's little doubt that Everton look favourites for that fourth place and a chance to have a crack at the Champions League and I for one would love to see them do it as it'll be a similar situation to that of Leeds in 2000-1 when no-one expected anything of us and ultimately we came so close to a remarkable final appearance. Like us, Everton would be an unknown quantity in Europe and could provide a shock, but hey, that's for the future.

Monday 17th January 2005
"There's no beginning, there'll be no end, �cause on my love you can depend." (Song)
Love Is All Around - Wet Wet Wet: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

In November 1997, Leeds became the first side to win a Prem game having been THREE goals down. Who were their opponents?
Derby: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Interesting to see that another war of words is breaking out between Sir Alex Ferguson and Arsene Wenger, although somewhat ironically it all goes back to that game in October at Old Trafford - almost three months ago! Why dig up old history I wonder, or is it anything to do with the clubs meeting again in just over a fortnight? Maybe it's just me but these spats are reminiscint of kids arguing in the playground and then rushing off to tell the head teacher (or the media in this case) and whilst Wenger is quick enough to claim today that Ferguson should be charged by the FA over his comments, maybe it would be a good thing for the FA to get them BOTH together and sort things out there and then. Failing that, use the old school trick of bashing their heads together!

A day off of work is supposed to be something to be enjoyed. Not so when you're told that today is the day we finally re-arrange the bedroom furniture and put up the new canvas covered wardrobe that's been lying around since we bought it earlier this month. Now, I'm not the world's biggest DIY fan and the words `Flat Pack` tend to terrify me, so having moved half the stuff in the room in able to create enough space not only to put the wardrobe together, but to actually place it in the right spot, I opened the box to discover a massive 82 different screws! As per usual, we rushed in head first and that was actually fine until we came to four shelves with wooden slats already across them. Now, we assumed that all four were the same size and it didn't matter which one went in each of the four spaces - WRONG! One of the four was around an inch shorter and had to go in the second available slot and having spent over half an hour trying to literally squeeze the outer pieces of wood together to try and fit it into the THIRD space, we read the instructions...again, only discover our error. Screws had to be undone and taken out, as did other shelves, and eventually we got it right, although only after twice getting two pieces of wood the wrong way around, meaning that the wood grips to screw into were on the wrong side. Overall it took almost two and a half hours when really we could probably do it again in under an hour. Personally, I'll be glad to get back to work tomorrow for a rest!

Tuesday 18th January 2005
"No matter how many times you save the world, it always manages to get back in jeopardy again." (Film)
The Incredibles: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Against which nation did David Beckham score his first goal for England?
Columbia: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Most of us would agree that player power is somewhat over evident in today's game with agents bleeding clubs and advertisers for every penny that they can get and then more. So with that in mind, a headline on the back of today's Star caught my eye, "Brum Tell Sav To Pay Up!" Closer inspection revealed that Birmingham had told Robbie Savage that he couldn't leave until he'd paid back advance payments of bonuses and image rights which he'd received as part of his new contract signed only four months ago. To his credit, he has done as requested, but it's good to see a club finally putting player power where it belongs - below the importance of the club as a whole.

`Never Judge A Book By It's Cover` or in this case, a meal by it's name! Apparently the new healthy option at Pizza Express (not a place that we often frequent anyway!) is called D`Autunno Chicken Salad and much like other fast food outlets, has obviously been dished up (!!) to try and counteract recent criticisms and attract those who don't want burgers, pizzas and chips. However, if you look below the posh name and salad, you have a shock as this new super-duper option contains 54g of fat and 942 calories! This is put into perspective when the newspaper (yes, I've been reading The Star today!) reveals that a Big Mac for example has 22.9g of fat and a calorie content of 493. Apparently the dressing is the culprit and the customer has the option to have the meal without it, which saves around half the fat. I wonder if they reduce the price if you take that choice...?

Wednesday 19th January 2005
"I hear the ticking of the clock, I'm lying here the room's pitch dark. I wonder where you are tonight, no answer on the telephone." (Song)
Alone - Heart: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

During the late 80s and early 90s, which two players scored own goal winners in FA Cup Finals?
Gary Mabbutt (1987) and Des Walker (1991): Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

It hasn't been a good few days for Liverpool has it? Defeat on Saturday at home to Man United was hard enough for them to take, however losing in the FA Cup last night to Burnley will be like swallowing one bitter pill and washing it down with metholated spitits. The signs were there from the line ups as Rafael Benitez took a risk and fielded a team of inexperienced youngsters with the odd exception, however Gerrard, Hamann, Carragher and Baros were all out, with only the latter even on the bench and while Man United got away with it, albeit just, against Exeter, it proved too much away at a Championship side and the shock result happened. The own goal winner simply rubbed salt into open wounds as Djimi Traore tried to drag the ball back in his own area and only succeeded in a highly complicated move which involved the gangling defender dragging the ball through his own legs and into the net! More salt late on when Antonio Nunez was sent off for an `elbow` on Rodney Trotter lookalike Tony Grant, although the reaction of the latter did as much to warrant the red card as the actions of the Spaniard. All told, not a four day period that Liverpool will look back on with relish.

One of the first `jobs` at work in the morning is to take down the twelve wooden security shutters that surround the windows overnight. These are heavy pieces of wood and take some carrying at 4:30am I can tell you. This morning, I was around halfway through collecting them when a police car pulled up at the side door where we take the shutters. Now, this also happened last week and they asked me if all was okay, however today he came out with a cracker in, "Are you breaking in?" I had to surpress a laugh when I explained to him what I was doing, even offering to show him the keys as, if I was doing as he'd feared, I was likely to stand there and admit it! Still, it's good to know that they are out and about in the early hours!

Quick prediction for tonight's big game: Man United to score inside the opening fifteen minutes and go on and win by three or four goals.

Thursday 20th January 2005
"You've never been so nuts about a guy. You wanna laugh you wanna cry. You cross your heart and hope to die." (Song)
Its Oh So Quiet - Bjork: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Who were the last club to beat Man United in an FA Cup 3rd Round match?
Bournemouth (1984): Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Well, my prediction was half right in that Man United scored early against Exeter, however to my surprise and to the total credit of the non-leaguers, they held their illutrious opponents within reach until late on when Wayne Rooney finally gave them a two goal cushion. In truth, had United played to their full potential in the first half and not been so exceptionally wasteful in the second, then Exeter could have been swept away, however it didn't happen and the record books will ultimately show how narrow the gap was. And that's how this game will now be remembered, in the record books and in the memories of the Exeter players and fans that were there at Old Trafford and at St James Park last night. So whilst United will hardly look back with any great joy, it's been a couple of occasions for many people to tell their kids and grandkids in the future that, "I was there!" or "I played against Man United in the FA Cup!" The magic of the cup isn't quite dead yet.

I spent a good couple of hours yesterday trying to get to the bottom of an unusual PC problem that my daughter encounter, namely that she couldn't access any web sites on Internet Explorer. The odd thing was that mail was being collected fine and ICQ and FTP were also working perfectly, so the connection was all okay, however trying and get a web site - and web site - and it was as though someone had pulled the lead. So after tweaking this and disabling that, rebooting more times than I care to remember, turning off the modem and then coming deperately close to throwing a hammer at the PC, I checked the Norton firewall to find that IE had been blocked from accessing the `Net! A simple 30 second proceedure needed to resolve the situation, which was made worse by the fact that my wife had suggested the very same problem two hours previous, only for yours truly to state, "Nah, it can't be that...!" Oops.

Friday 21st January 2005
"It's getting so lonely inside this bed. Don't know if I should lick my wounds or say woe is me instead." (Song)
Turn Off The Light - Nelly Furtado: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

West Brom(wich Albion) beat which two Prem clubs in the Carling Cup last season?

So, Ken Bates is the new Leeds chairman! A few years back, I'd have wondered quite what the future held if this had happened, now I'm simply relieved that the threat of administration and subsequent loss of ten points has been averted for the time being. The ex-Chelsea chairman is certainly no mug and, looking on the bright side, could be just the sort of guy to knock the club back into shape, starting behind the scenes and in many ways you have to admire him and the like of Doug Ellis for still getting involved at an age where most 73-year olds would be happy to put their slippered feet up and relax in front of a roaring fire. Apparently, the current board are expected to resign their positions, with the exception of Leeds legend Peter Lorimer who Bates wants to remain, so the forthcoming week or so should be interesting behind the scenes to say the least!

There's trouble brewing in the West Midlands (sorry for the poor Brummie accent!). Apparently, some of the older fans are bemoaning the media for shorting the name of their club. You see, the full and proper name is West Bromwich Albion, however many including Sky and the BBC, not to mention this very site, are refering to the club as West Brom. One local chap, I believe an MP or retired councilor, has really got on his high horse over this and is urging everyone to call them by their right and proper name and not shorten it, however from my viewpoint, it's a hell of a lot to type so maybe a compromise and I'll call the WBA would be okay? Local opinion is split with the older generation agreeing and the younger fans prefering the short version. One chap, another of the younger ones, got it spot on though when he simply said, "Does it really matter? It's still the same football club, so get a life!"

Saturday 22nd January 2005
"As they would mingle with the good people we meet. Good friends we have, oh, good friends we've lost along the way." (Song)
No Woman No Cry - Bob Marley: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Which goalkeeper kept a remarkable 28 clean sheet from 42 games in season 1978-79?
Ray Clemence: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

If there's one thing that irritates me as a football fan, it's when a non-fan takes great delight in telling me, "I really don't see what you enjoy in football!" - As if I should be delighted to hear it! Well, one of the primary reasons is the sheer unpredictability of the game. Sure, there are surprises in most sports, however as an exmaple...

How many of us would have bet on Southampton - with just two wins in 23 games and second from bottom - playing Liverpool off the park and winning 2-0? I know it's been a bad week for the Anfield side, but this resulted rounded it off poorly for them, although credit to the home side as they thoroughly deserved it.

Example; How many of us would have thought that Crystal Palace - struggling to stay out of the drop zone this season - would destroy Spurs - one of the most in form clubs in the country in the last few weeks - with a three goal blitz?

Example; I'll bet many of us didn't expect West Bromwich Albion (!!) to see off Man City in the evening game. They stay bottom after what was only their second win in 24 games, however their confidence will surely be boosted by this.

Example; How many Norwich fans decided to make an early exit when their team went 4-1 down at home to Middlesbrough with twelve minutes left? How many felt that, despite a goal ten minutes from time, that it was a lost cause with two minutes to go and the score at 4-2? How many were thrilled that they'd stayed when Norwich scored twice in the final two minutes to draw 4-4?? As I said, totally unpredictable - That's what we see in it!

Of course, some things remain the same with Chelsea and Man United both scoring three at home to win with ease, putting the pressure onto Arsenal who face a tricky one at home to Newcastle tomorrow. Gunners boss Arsene Wenger reckons that they need to win 14 of their 15 remaining games to have any chance, although the way that Chelsea are playing even that might not be enough. That said, it was only three or four months ago that Arsenal looked unstoppable and we were saying that the title was sewn up, so you never quite know...

Sunday 23rd January 2005
"Clean shirt, new shoes and I don't know where I am going to. Silk suit, black tie, I don't need a reason why." (Song)
Sharp Dressed Man - ZZ Top: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Two Chelsea managers of the 60s and 70s later took charge at Man United. Which pair?

Chelsea and Man United did it yesterday, their victories putting pressure on Arsenal, and the Gunners replied in kind with a narrow , yet deserved, win against Newcastle today. For the most part they looked in control and with the benefit of hindsight, probably grateful that they scored quite early on to settle the nerves, because as the game wore on, you always had that nagging feeling that an equaliser might just arrive, as it did with Bolton and West Brom at Highbury earlier in the season. There was one interesting point mentioned in commentary that hadn't occured to me before, but will at least give Arsenal and Man Utd one extra straw to grasp at and that's whilst Chelsea continue to hold a healthy lead and seem able to win with ease, United and Arsenal have the experience of not only a title run-in, but of also keeping their nerve and winning the league. There's always that outside possibility that Chelsea, if things begin to work against them, could get nervy...or are we kidding ourselves?

Monday 24th January 2005
"You live in Beverly Hills. Everyone in the world knows who you are, my mother has trouble remembering my name." (Film)
Notting Hill: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Whose stadium was recently renamed as the KitKat stadium?
York City: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

What is it with Newcastle this season? Earlier in the campaign we had Kieron Dyer falling out with former boss Sir Bobby Robson after he apparently refused to play in a certain position and now yesterday Craig Bellamy has a spat with boss Graeme Souness over...well, take your pick really! Did he also refuse to play right midfield? Did he state that he was injured and walk out of training, only to pronounce himself fit and available 24 hours later? Was he abducted by aliens? All are possibilities according to TV and papers and it shouldn't be forgotten that this is the same player that was somewhat peeved at being substituted during a televised game earlier in the season and was caught on camera calling his boss something less than complimentary. According to Souness, he is `trying to create a team spirit` at the club. At the moment, there seems to be more loose cannons than anything and a look at the league position would suggest that this isn't helping matters.

According to `experts`, today is the most depressing day of the year. Yes, some bright sparks at a uni somewhere or other have devised a formula which tells us that January 24th is the day that we're all most likely to be totally and utterly cheesed off with things. Now, taking this with a massive pinch of salt is probably the best thing to do as there are far too many variables in life that can change matters. For example, Leeds won on Saturday which puts a smile on my face until we play next, yet I had to work on my day off today which wipes it off again! Most noticable though is now boffins can now devise a formula for just about anything from how to decorate a Christmas tree perfectly to how to make the perfect cup of tea (also total rubbish as we all like our tea differently anyway!). That said, if someone can figure out how to eat a jam doughnut without the filling splurting out of the end like a zombie in a George A Romero film, then I'd apreciate it!

Tuesday 25th January 2005
"Well, if you told me you were drowning, I would not lend a hand. I've seen your face before my friend. But I don't know if you know who I am." (Song)
In The Air Tonight - Phil Collins: Correctly answered by Helen LLoyd

Ten years ago today, Eric Cantona did his infamous kung-fu kick on a Crystal Palace fan. But which player did the Frenchman kick out at to get sent off prior to the incident?
Richard Shaw: Correctly answered by Helen LLoyd and Matt Robbins

I guess there are always going to be players that fans `love to hate` and on most lists prior to last night was probably El-Hadji Diouf. His spitting antics in the past would have been enough to confirm that, however in the 1-0 win for his Bolton side against Blackburn last night, he did his utmost to alienate himself from the remainder of the footballing world. Okay, so a deliberate dive is hardly as bad as spitting at someone, but it is outright cheating and for your own manager to substitute you straight after the incident, well that speaks volumes. Even earlier in the game, he caught Andy Todd with a forearm and the replays showed him looking at his opponent more than the more so he was a little lucky to escape with only a yellow card then. I wonder if the referee didn't bottle it a little as, when Diouf dived, he knew that it was either a penalty or a second yellow and subsequent red for the Senegalese star and in many ways he took the easy option. I'm sure I wasn't the only neutral that jumped off his seat when Brad Friedel saved the penalty, only to be knocked down to earth seconds later. I like Bolton and Sam Allardyce and feel that he's done a superb job with limited resources at an unfashionable club, however the next time we hear him going on about the smaller clubs never getting the decisions, then I'll take it with a bucketload of salt. As for Diouf, he's a bloody cheat, pure and simple. Sadly, he's not the only one.

Wednesday 26th January 2005
"Don't laugh at me, don't look away. You'll follow me back with the sun in your eyes and on your own." (Song)
Bedshaped - Keane: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Prior to today, who were the last club to beat Man United in a league cup semi final?

In the context of all that's happened in the last week to Liverpool, we can only really speculate as to how important last night's win at Watford was. The 1-0 win mirrored the first leg result, even down to the goalscorer and puts the Anfield side into the Carling Cup Final for the third time in five years and for the next month at least, gives the club and the fans something to look forward to. The final itself is the Sunday after the Champions League starts up again and will be a crucial week for Liverpool as qualification for next season's CL, or indeed Europe itself, is by no means a foregone conclusion. The game itself last night was little to write home about as Liverpool remained totally professional and barely gave the Championship side any chance to get a genuine foothold on the game. That said, Liverpool will take `unexciting and productive` above getting knocked out at the moment!

Speaking of unexciting, haven't there been some dull games on the box lately? Naturally for the clubs involved and their fans it's been a different matter, however for those of us lucky to be sat in the comfort of our living room expecting to be entertained, it's been more a matter of trying to stay awake. Tonight then, we live in hope that Man United and Chelsea, two of the Big Three, can provide something a bit special. Both have bigger fish to fry as regards silverware this season, but neither manager would turn down a place in a cup final, especially when he's just 90 minutes away from exactly that. I'm hoping to be proved horribly wrong, but I've got the feeling that it'll be another damp squib, decided by one goal, probably to United. But then, with these two facing each other, it surely can't be dull....

Thursday 27th January 2005
"I'm breaking it down, I'm not the same, I know you're feeling me, 'cos you like it like this." (Song)
Spinning Around - Kylie Minogue: Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Chelsea have won the league cup twice to date, but who did they LOSE to in the one final that they didn't win?
Stoke City (1972): Correctly answered by Helen Lloyd

Finally a game worthy of the name as Man United and Chelsea served up a decent encounter which, whilst not a classic, certainly had me on the edge of my seat for the latter stages. I must admit that once Ryan Giggs equalised, I could see the game heading to extra time which not only means my having to stay up for an extra half and hour, but usually means later papers in the morning, leading to extra work and hassle. So, when the 80 minute mark arrived, I would have been delighted for anyone to score, even Man United, to avert the additional period. So, when Damien Duff curled that free kick in - and you could see it was on it's way in almost straight away - I was off the sofa like a shot, although half expecting to see an offside flag raised. I then spent the next eight minutes praying to the God of `proverbial brick wall in front of nets` that United wouldn't equalise again, sparking the extra time scenario all over. All told, United had the possession and didn't do enough with it, although admittedly they did score a superb goal and should have had a penalty in the first half, Chelsea got the win thanks to a little stroke of luck and a goalkeeper with lead boots and my faith in exciting, edge of the seat, televised football is restored... for the time being!

Speaking of newspapers, it brings me (rather neatly I thought) to this morning. Our local weekly rag suffered overnight printing problems resulting in it arriving too late for most of our deliverers. This led to an overheated telephone as around 600 of the 800 that have the Somerset Standard didn't get it at it's usual time. The answerphone eventually took the brunt but even that looked knackered by the time I finished. Add to that, two full bundles of Daily Mirror which got lost and arrived two hours later and you have a good morning! Thankfully we had enough Mirror to get some deliveries out, but yours truly still had to trot around in the freezing rain and howling wind and deliver around thirty. It was all made worthwhile though on an old folks estate when one elderly lady was in her wheelchair, apparently glaring into space out of her window. She then spotted me and pointed her finger at me as I went up her pathway and then a broad smile beamed across her face, she gave a little royalty-style wave and mouthed the words `Thank you so much` at me. Now, people are quick enough to criticise and bite your head off when things get screwed up, however praise and thanks when things go right or when you've gone above the call of duty are rare (although our boss is very good I should add), so it was nice for that little touch from a lady whose probably housebound and whose little pleasures in life include reading the paper and doing the crossword. It made the howling wind and freezing rain (did I mention that before?) slightly more bearable.

Friday 28th January 2005
"I never thought it would happen with me and the girl from Clapham." (Song)
Up The Junction - Squeeze: Correctly answered by Marcus Ellis

In 1977-78, which non-league club were included in the quarter-final draw for the FA Cup having drawn their fifth round clash with Wrexham?

You have to admire the FA's stance on racism in recent years. They've worked closely with clubs and local communities and really done well to raise awareness of a tricky problem and, to a certain extent, stamp it out. So, when they recently released a new DVD, imaginatively entitled, "Pride Of The Nation" and focusing on the best players to wear the Three Lions in the last sixty years, you would think that at least one non-white player would be included, but nope. Now, you could argue, as Rio Ferdinand had tactfully done, that players should be picked on ability rather than skin colour and if that means no black players, then so be it. However in the current politically correct climate when people are all too quick to jump on the bandwagon when something seems amiss, you would think that someone, somewhere would have said, "Look we'd better include player x or player y, just so we don't cause offence." However, they didn't and they have, prompting an updated version featuring several black players. Political own goal from the FA!

Saturday 29th January 2005
"You Won't Believe Your Eye." (Film Tagline)
Monsters Inc: Correctly answered by kirstymd

Which current Prem club are one of only two sides to have won the FA Cup for three successive years?
Blackburn: Correctly answsered by Matt Robbins

Well, well! Talk about a game of two halves to use a well worn cliche. The south coast derby ws the very epitomy of this as half time arrived with few chances and little to talk about and probably with outsiders wondering what all the pre-match fuss was all about. Then the second half arrived with a brilliant goal and a dodgy penalty, followed soon afterwards by a justified (within the letter of the law!) but odd, sending off and suddenly the game was on a knife edge with Saints boss Harry Redknapp needing a replay at Fratton Park like he needed a hole in the head! ompey sub Ricardo Fuller then missed a sitter as he tried to break the net from six yards and ended up hitting the far area of the stand behind the goal. And then came that stoppage time penalty for handball and whilst everyone can blame the officials for getting it wrong, you can understand totally why it was awarded as Matt Taylor's arm instinctively went out, even if it did hit him on the shoulder. Indeed, I wonder how many other armchair fans found themselves yelling out "Hand ball" as it happened - I know I did and co-commentator Mark Bright admittedly that he was also guilty, so just for once, maybe lay off the officials, although Pompey fans may not be quite as accomodating. Good game though overall with another edge of the seat finale.

You know it's a slow news day when the headlines are made by Derby drawing at home to Fulham! However, after all the third round excitement, the fourth round gave us no major shocks today with only the likes of one of my local sides, Yeovil, coming close with a narrow 3-2 defeat at Charlton. But that's the FA Cup for you. We all remember the great games and headline busting results, but for each of those, there are a dozen games that go to form and end up as a stat in the record book. That said, it probably won't stop some sceptics from moaning about how the `magic of the cup` is gone and how the bigger clubs are pulling further and further away from the rest. You can't please all of the people, all of the time.

Sunday 30th January 2005
"Hoping that I�ll be a part of you again some day. All I do each night is think of the times I closed the door to keep my love within." (Song)

As regards the FA Cup THIRD round as a whole, what happened in season 1950-51 that has never occurred since?

Another two FA Cup games today and another two which went totally as expected. To be fair, with favourites Bolton (at Oldham) and Chelsea (hosting Birmingham) both scoring inside the opening ten minutes, the game could have been over far early than it actually was, however Oldham gave as good as they got and got physical with their Premiership opponents and had a couple of decent chances to level matters and were still in it deep into stoppage time, by which time Bolton had plenty of chances to exercise their well practised time wasting ploys. Birmingham on the other hand never looked likely to score until the second half when they seemed to just step up a gear and almost forget about the illustrious opponents and treat it as a match rather than a training game for Chelsea. Only late on when John Terry add a second goal did the result look beyond doubt, but even then there were chances as Chelsea went down to ten men when the injured Robert Huth was hauled off with all three subs already on. So, bemoan the lack of shocks if you like, but on the plus side, it makes for a strong last sixteen line up.

Monday 31st January 2005
"I believe in truth though I lie a lot. I feel the pain from the push and shove." (Song)
Love Action - Human League: Correctly answered by Marcus Ellis

Which FA Cup winning Man United captain of the 70s briefly managed Burnley in the mid 80s?

While the fourth round of the FA Cup may have been disappointing for the old romantics, the fifth round draw has thrown up some mouthwatering games, notably at Goodison where Man United travel to Everton in a game which will surely be substitled `Rooney's Return`. Already you can see the potential scenario of a late winner after he's been roundly jeered all game, however it's 99.9% certain to be televised and it's sure to be unmissable. If that game threatens to unhinge United's grip on the trophy, Chelsea's hopes of a quadruple will be seriously tested at Newcastle where the home side will look to avenge the 4-0 defeat inflicted on them at Stamford Bridge earlier in the season. A third `unmissable` comes in a game which will split East Lancashire as Burnley host Blackburn in a grudge local derby. It would be unfair to state that both clubs hate each other as there are so many oustiders there now, however there will be little love lost between the sets of fans and that will likely transmit to the pitch! Potentially there is a fourth cracker in prospect, but only if West Brom beat Spurs in their replay. That will set up a return to the Hawthorns of former boss Gary Megson, who's now in charge at Nottm Forest. Yep, fifth round weekend looks to be something to look forward to.

Anyone who has been near a seaside arcade in the last couple of years will surely have seen those dance games where the player `dances` on flashing squares in co-ordination with screen instructions. Secretly, I've always fancied a go, however paying a pound to do a `Bambi On Ice` rendition in front of watching strangers has put me off somewhat. So when my daughter's friend received a dancemat for her playstation last week as a birthday present and then we were invited up for tea on Saturday, I knew that I'd be `invited` to have a go on the new dancemat and so it proved. The object is simply (ha!) to press the correct square on the mat with your foot in timing with it reaching the top of the screen and for each `step` you are rated anything from `Boo!` (totally missing it!), Almost, Good and Perfect. Extra points are also given for Combo's which are successive correct steps. They gave me an easy one to start and I got on quite well, only to be given an extremely fast one afterwards which had me beaten half way through. Eventually we all came to a `happy medium` agreement on one tune which wasn't overly easy, but not too fast either so whilst my daughter and the kids managed Combo's in the 40s and 50s and scores of 800,000+, us adults struggled to achieve a quarter of that with my best topping a Combo of 13 and a score of around 170,000. Indeed, it was a toss up as to which of us adults tried to emulate the kids too much and ended up flapping around like a fly caught in a spider's web! It always looks easy when someone else does it!

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