Views From The Armchair

"Views From The `Footiemad` Armchair
Diary Of A Season January 2004

Thursday 1st January 2004
"My job is very boring I'm an office clerk, the only thing that helps me pass the time away." (Song)
Echo Beach - Martha and the Muffins: Correctly answered by Adrian Jobling

Which club is the oldest of all the Scottish league clubs?

Happy New Year To One And All!!!!! So, how did you spend last night? Did you see the new year in and get soaking wet in the process as many did in the UK? We spent the evening at our friends house (four adults, three kids) playing the likes of Trivial Pursuit as the night wore on and the rain got heavier. If anything, the new year was a bit of a damp squib with a few fireworks going off here and there, but nothing quite like the last couple of years. The rain didn't help and we got drenched even going from our friends' house to our car and then from the car to our own front door! Unfortunately, due to circumstances conspiring against me, I found out yesterday that I'd be needed in work today at 4:30am having originally been given the day off (no-one's fault, just one of those things!), so I ended up with less than three hours sleep and making sure I had plenty to do at work to avoid nodding off! The steady stream of customers obviously helped, but it's not something that I'd recommend, indeed once back home again, my first task was to get straight back to bed!!

If you have kids, or even if you don't, you may have gone to a panto recently or are perhaps going to one soon. There are a couple around Bath and Bristol near us with `big name stars` taking part, although I must admit that none are household names to me, however as we have done for the last 5-6 years, we booked in to the one in our own town, performed totally by the amateurs of the FAOS (Frome Amateur Operatic Society) which took place at the Memorial Hall very close to the shop where I work. As usual, the show - Jack and the Beanstalk - was of a very high quality and included nothing smutty or near the knuckle and had the traditional `kids from the audience` on stage at the tail end. The villain (his first `baddie` role) was very impressive and the giant itself probably scared a few younger kids if truth were known, however particular high praise goes to one of the leading girls whose sister was originally cast in the role of Jill only to fall ill, so she took over at very short notice and sailed through. One of the advantages of these locals shows is that invariably you know some of the performers personally and in our case it was Jack's Mum, played brilliantly as always by a certain Humphrey Barnes. He comes in our shop on a weekly basis and often chats to my wife or myself, however having spotted us in the audience at yesterday's performance, he announced in his Dame Dotty Trott voice, "Oooohhh, he delivers my newspapers!!" At least one further reference followed later in the show and overall it was worth every single penny. Equally it was no surprise to hear that hardly any tickets remains for any of the six remaining performances (and we are talking a decent sized venue as well!). So if you can't get along to a show starring someone from EastEnders or Emmerdale, take a look a little more locally - you may be surprised!

Friday 2nd January 2004
"This is not about your son's attendance record. For the last week your son has been teaching twelfth grade French. He conducted a parent teacher interview yesterday and organized a field trip to a French bread factory in Trenton." (Film)
Catch Me If You Can: Correctly answered by Jaan Roos

Which current Prem club has a 100% record in league cup finals having won both they've appeared in?

I didnt know whether to be delighted or depressed when I read that Leeds are looking to sign players on loan during this transfer window! That was part of our early season problem and as long as the errors made by Peter Reid are noted and not followed, then we may be okay. The primary problem is that we signed a whole load of average Johnny Foreigners, who might well be decent players in their own right (indeed a couple did look okay), but sadly didnt gell within the Leeds set up and with the current crop of players, resulting in Eddie Gray effectively scrapping them all aside from Jermaine Pennant. So, how about this time choosing players who have English as a first language and can therefore communicate with their fellow team mates and preferably go for players currently playing in England or at least have experience of the English game. Naturally with the current financial situation, we cannot go out and splash the cash (been there, done that, screwed up!) so loaning solves that problem, however if we end up with three new players from South America, Japan and Hungary, then I'll get the road maps out for Gillingham and Millwall now!

The Xmas deco's came down today - well it was a choice of today or Sunday and with two televised FA Cup ties on Sunday, what would you have done? - and it took a hell of a lot less time than putting them up. Aside from yours truly risking life and limb to climb on a rickety chair with a knife in my hand, preparing to unhook drawing pins from the ceiling, the biggest problem involved the dogs - or Biscuit in particular. Being the puppy, he still has very quick reactions (expect when telling him `No`!) and each time a decoration dropped, he was on it like a flash, ready to attack and maul it as though a deadly enemy. Equally tricky, albeit for different reasons, was the way he pounced over each time a drawing pin slipped from my hand and onto the floor! Attacking an inanimate piece of Xmas decoration is one thing, but swallowing a sharp pin is a different problem altogether and thankfully we did avoid a costly trip to the vets. The only thing now is that the house looks so bare with no tree and no deco's! Oh well, only another eleven months to go!

Saturday 3rd January 2004
"Me and some guys from school, had a band and we tried real hard." (Song)
Summer of 69 - Bryan Adams: Correctly answered by Jeff Slater

Freddie Kanoute joined West Ham from which French club?

FA Cup 3rd round day always throws up some good stories and today was no exception at all! From the upsets - Telford winning at Crewe whilst two other non-leaguers (Scarborough and Accrington Stanley) both drew against league opposition - to the surprises - high flying Charlton losing at Gillingham despite taking a 35th SECOND lead - to the `oh so nearly` - Portsmouth winning in the last minute against Blackpool and Wolves earning a late replay against local rivals Kidderminster. For all those performances, Watford are also worthy of a mention after twice leading against Chelsea only to be pegged back for a replay. They were superb against a club who have had their cake and eaten it this season, but are yet to get the cherry on the top in the same of a trophy. Two things to mention about the game though beginning with Watford's first `goal` which was allowed despite clearly NOT crossing the line! I was under the impression that the officials had to be 100% certain with these sort of scenario's and whilst it did set up a superb first half, you did feel that Watford were the beneficiaries of one of the weekend's worst decisions. Secondly, we had the situation where a player on loan, in this came Watford keeper Lenny Pidgeley, was playing against his employers after Chelsea gave permission for him to play against them (Unlike Arsenal with Jermaine Pennant tomorrow!!). Best chant of the day came from the Watford fans who cheered Pidgeley as "Chelsea's number One!" Maybe in time.

How often does a player find form when in the news for various reasons? Nicky Butt was linked with a move away from Old Trafford before Christmas and then promptly scores against Everton! Equally, Spurs striker Freddie Kanoute has been in the spotlight this week with the `club v country` row over his African Nations Cup involvement with Mali and then Spurs' apparently deciding that if he plays for Mali, they'll sell him at the end of the season! Today he nets a hat trick against Crystal Palace, putting the Spurs big-wigs in an incredibly awkward position! If they still sell him then one of their primary assests will have left and if they don't, it'll look like a U-turn! My bet is that they'll announce that there was never any truth in the reports that he'd be sold and that all is rosy between player and club. Draw your own conclusions!

Finally a quick word about Chesterfield. Many will recall their wonderful FA Cup run in 1997 when they so nearly reached the final whilst in the second division. Seven years on and they are already out of this years competition, however today they faced high flying Plymouth in a league match. After eighteen minutes, Chesterfield were 5-0 down and that was 6-0 by half time! Things got better in the second half as only one more goal was netted, resulting in a 7-0 hammering! How yesterday's giant killers become toady's minnows eh!

Sunday 4th January 2004
"I've always thought that I would love to live by the sea, to travel the world alone and live more simply." (Song)

Aside from the actual final, who were the last club to knock Arsenal out of the FA Cup?

For eighteen glorious minutes, the miracle looked as though it could happen! No, not Yeovil beating Liverpool, but even more unlikely, Leeds beating Arsenal! Yes, after Jens Lehmann's late Christmas present to Mark Viduka put us ahead, I dared to believe that we could actually inflict defeat on the Gunners. Sadly it didnt last and once they levelled matters, we rarely looked like getting anything but a defeat and it wasn't so much who would win, but more a matter of by how many. Arsenal deserved it in truth and I have few gripes with the result or, somewhat strangely, the Leeds display, which wasn't actually all that bad. Ultimately this could well be a blessing in disguise as we have no other footballing things to concentrate on but avoiding relegation, although the small matter of finding a buyer within two weeks and keeping the vultures from the transfer window also have to be considered. Just over two hours since the final whistle went and there's been no bad mood, no disappointment (well, maybe a little!) and, more to the point, no surprise!

Our puppy, Biscuit, delightfully playful that he is, does have this current habit of screwing things up, either through sheer bad luck or sheer puppy-ness! Last weekend he managed to chew through my network cable, effectively knocking my `Net connection out for 24 hours, so imagine my thoughts last night when, whilst watching the Saints-Newcastle match downstairs, I heard one almighty crash from upstairs, followed by crying. On investigation, there was one daughter spread-eagled on the landing with dozens of books scattered around her...and Biscuit wagging his tail looking for his next trick! We later discovered that our daughter was knelt at the bookcase looking for some light bedtime reading and Biscuit trotted up behind her, put his paws onto her back, pushing her against the bookcase which promptly toppled forward on top of her! Needless to say, this afternoon between football, we've had a major revamp on the landing with dangerous bookcases now well out of reach for canines!

Monday 5th January 2004
"I'd sit alone and watch your light. My only friend through teenage nights. And everything I had to know, I heard it on my radio." (Song)

Last season (02-03), who were the highest positioned club NOT to qualify for Europe?
Everton: Correctly answered by Jaan Roos

Being a bit of a traditionalist, I do like seeing the FA Cup draw back on at Monday lunchtime as it was when I was at school. Back then, it was a radio only job and there was usually a kindly teacher (equally mad on football!) who would let some of us listen to it. We'd then go back into the playground and tell those who hadn't heard the draw that their clubs had drawn Liverpool away (Liverpool were good back then boys and girls!). Today's fourth round draw threw up only one real biggie with Liverpool at home to Newcastle (no joking this time!), although there are other all Prem clashes, notably Everton-Fulham and Arsenal-Boro. However, it's around now that I try and find one club who could be a dark horse for the latter stages - a club which perhaps you wouldn't look at betting on them for the cup, but equally could just spring a surprise. So, with apologies to advance to all fans of this particular club as my predicting skills are notoriously poor, however after a good 3rd round result and a favourable 4th round draw, I have a sneaky feeling for Birmingham this year.

So Britney Spears gets married and then decides it was all a big mistake. Fair enough I guess, after all she's not the first celeb to have a marriage fall flat, however on this occasion it lasted just a few hours! Yes, Ms Spears (or should that be Mrs Alexander) went partying in Las Vegas, had a few drinks and then thought it would be a good laugh to get a marriage licence and wed her childhood sweetheart...only to then have second thoughts AFTER the ceremony and, at the time of typing, is seeking to have the marriage annulled, effectively letting the records show that it never even took place. Friends say that it was a prank which went too far - I say that Spears/Alexander has very little respect for herself or the vows to even consider getting wed as a `prank`. As her career appears to be drifting down the toilet, her move from the early `catchy pop` style to a more hardened style has won her few new fans and lost many of her old ones and you wonder if the `prank` was part of a publicity stunt to ensure that the public doesn't forget who she is! Maybe I'm being too harsh and too cynical, maybe I'm too traditional or maybe I'm just fed up with has-been celebs believing they can do what they want and then forget it ever happened if they aren't totally happy with it.

Tuesday 6th January 2004
"And when I'm sad, you're a clown and when I get scared, you're always around." (Song)

Which current Prem player was sent off in a World Cup Final?
Marcel Desailly (France 1998): Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Alan Smith linked with Newcastle and Man United, Paul Robinson today linked with Spurs and Mark Viduka linked with half of Europe! Where will it all end?? Well for now, it'll cease on Jan 31st when the transfer window closes, however if you think logically about it, no club with any sense are likely to put a bid in for ANY Leeds player over the next fortnight. And why I hear you ask? Well, on the 19th of this month, the club have to find a way to keep their debtors happy or face the short and long term consequences. The talk of an overseas consortium splashing their cash has gone ominously quiet, leaving the threat of administration hanging over the club like a yet-to-be-housetrained-puppy. Should that happen, then players will be leaving for an absolute fraction of their market value and certainly a lot less than they would go for at this precise time. Basically, any potential buying clubs have nothing to lose by waiting. If the threat of administration is staved off, then they still have almost two weeks before the window closes to get their man/men. Whatever happens, January is a nervy and exceptionally important month for Leeds United FC.

In recent years, certainly over the last decade or so, I've never really found the time to play computer games in the way that I did during the teenage years (and yes, we did have computers back then, albeit ZX Spectrums and C64's!). However, we got a Game Cube for Xmas and a few cheap games to go with it and all three of us have got into a rally racing game, the name of which escapes me, pitting two or three of us against each other over various surfaces and tracks. Now, whilst we try and keep the spirit of `playing to enjoy rather than playing to win`, it does get competitive with our daughter now perfecting the art of ramming our cars from the rear and sending us flying off the cliff/sand/ice patch, resembling something from the Harry Potter flying car scene, whilst she goes sailing on by! That said, we give as good as we get and all in all it's a piece of harmless fun! However, as the time flew by the other evening whilst playing, it struck me that it's easy to see how teens (and probably older) kids CAN and do get addicted to playing these sort of games. For us with a little more willpower, it's simple to say `enough is enough` and switch the console off, however there are plenty out there who just want `one more go` to get to the next stage or to slay the hideous fire-eating dragon.

Wednesday 7th January 2004
"You like pain? Try wearing a corset!" (Film)
Pirates of the Caribbean: Correctly answered by Jeff Slater

Last season, which Prem club played 20 cups matches, none of which were in the Champions League?

I wonder how many sports/football teachers or coaches watched last night's Villa v Pompey game and thought the same as me, that the first two goals were absolutely classic examples of how to head the ball for goal. From Juan Pablo Angel's superb far post rise and header in to the thumping header from Yakubu early in the second half, both were text book examples of scoring with two different sorts of header and would do no harm to be replayed to schoolboys (and girls if relevant) as part of their coaching. Equally impressive was the delivery for both goals with inch perfect crosses begging to be converted. It's therefore somewhat ironic that the winning goal was the sort which resembled a pinball machine with the ball bouncing everywhere and anyway before finding the net via Darius Vassell's stomach! With the win putting Villa into sixth, it's yet another example of how a decent run of games can propell you up the table, proved by the fact that Villa were in the drop zone not all that long ago. As for Pompey, well they've injuries and suspensions coming out of the woodwork, but that means nothing if at the end of the season, not enough points have been accumulated.

Some rare potential good news from Elland Road today as Leeds are offering a trial to Georghi Kinkladze with a view to a permanent move. The Georgian is available on a free as he's currently without a club, so the problem of a transfer fee is eliminated. If he is still capable of the sort of form he showed during his time at Man City, and to a lesser extent, Derby, then he'd be an excellent aquisition for us and a perfect balance in midfield to counteract the `steel` that we have in abundance with the likes of Batty, Smith, Johnson and Morris! Of course, whether he shows enough quality on trial for the club to want him or indeed whether he wants to sign remains to be seen, however despite it only being a small chink of light through the darkening clouds, please let me savour the potential!

Thursday 8th January 2004
"No New Year's Day to celebrate. No chocolate covered candy hearts to give away."(Song)
I Just Called To Say I Love You - Stevie Wonder: Correctly answered by Jinder Singh

Trevor Francis was England's first �1m transfer in 1979, however from which club did Nottm Forest sign him?
Birmingham: Correctly answered by Cheryl Warner

I wonder, when May comes around and the final table is there in all it's glory, how significant the night of January 7th will have been? Perhaps that was the evening when the primary three title contenders showed their true worth in the race for the top domestic prize as they all concreted what we already knew. Chelsea have been faltering over the last month and, as a fan put it to me this morning, other clubs are beginning to `suss them out` and the surprise factor is no longer their. The home defeat against Liverpool leaves them a full seven points adrift of the leaders and with a proverbial mountain to climb. They are even four points behind Arsenal who are still unbeaten (and maybe heading for that 29 game unbeaten start to a season currently shared by Leeds and Liverpool), however how many times have I mentioned about them conceding late equalisers and the same happened again last night at Everton! To be unbeaten is a great achievement, but too many draws is not ideal when trophy hunting and the Gunners are starting to pay! And finally to Man United and the stage of the season when they traditionally move into overdrive and give the two-fingered salute to all and sundry trailing in their wake. Like the two aforementioned London clubs, United's display at Bolton was typical - take an early lead, build on it and then consolidate. They've been doing it for years and will probably continue to do so, although last night they weren't the only leopards to show their true spots.

Did you know that the African Cup of Nations has been going since 1957? Nope, neither did I until I looked it up - and why should we? It's only over the last decade or so that the competition has had any relevance to us in the UK and Europe, and largely for controversial reasons. Prior to the inception of the Prem in 1992, African players in England were a rarity, however over the last ten years or so, more and more have been signed by our top clubs and then, every two years, we have the `club v country` row emerging due to the ACofN falling slap bang in the middle of our domestic season. This year we've had the Spurs-Kanoute-Mali eternal triangle whilst Arsenal have been falling out with Nigeria over Kanu! It's happened before with Leeds and South Africa (Lucas Radebe and Phil Masinga) and Ghana with Tony Yeboah, indeed he returned injured from the 1996 tournament and was never the same again. The same will happen in the future or for as long as the tournament is held in January or February (which I assume is due to climatic reasons above anything else), however clubs must remember that whilst they are playing the wages, it's a massive honour for the player to represent his nation and, more to the point, the clubs were surely aware of these problems when they first signed the player(s). I believe it was Pele who stated that an African nation would win the World Cup in the near future. I have my doubts I must confess, however this forthcoming competition will be a decent pointer for 2006 in Germany, but beware of even more club v country fall-outs!

Friday 9th January 2004
"Maybe one day when my ship comes in, she'll understand what kind of guy I am."(Song)
Uptown Girl - Billy Joel: Correctly answered by OPE9

Between 1977 and 1984, only one club outside of England won the European Cup? Which club?
Hamburg (1983): Correctly answered by OPE9

Strachan To Quit Saints! Thus screamed the back page headline from one of the papers today which I instantly put down to paper talk and as a space filler, however me of little faith, it now transpires that it's true and that the great ginger haired one is not renewing his contract after this season! So, what's the reasoning? Well, according to a statement, it's for medical and personal reasons, so as long as that's not a cover-up for something else (and knowing Strachan he IS being honest!) you have to admire the guy. The stress and pressure of managing any football club has to be immense and even at the ripe young age of 47, something clearly isn't quite 100% with the canny Scot and he's obviously decided to take a break before nature enforces on one him. So, is he making the wrong move? Catagorically NO! You only have to look at what's happened to Dario Gradi, Gerard Houllier, Graeme Souness and Joe Kinnear in recent years, not to mention the tragedy of Jock Stein, to realise what can happen and I only hope that by taking this decision, Strachan will benefit in the long run.

As Britain's law makers, continue to wage war on the motorist, today's latest relevation is one of the more laughable regulations. In recent times we've had some decent new laws of the road, notably the one banning the use of mobile phones whilst driving, to others which are less sensible, especially the recent `powers` given to traffic wardens to hand out on the spot fines for various undangerous offences. So, not content with putting up more speed cameras and bombarding us with enough roadworks to make a one hour trip take 50% longer, we now have a parking offence which states that if you park your car more than 50cm away from the kerb, then you are liable for a fine! I could think of a few around my area who would get hit in the wallet on a regular basis, however surely this is a little uncalled for? I mean, it's hardly a danger unless it's blocking the road and it's hardly likely to cause serious injury, but of course the motorist remains an easy target for the powers that be don't they.

Saturday 10th January 2004
"He knows no fear, he knows no danger. He knows nothing."(Film Tagline)
Johnny English: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Which English referee took charge of the 1974 World Cup Final and awarded a penalty against the host nation inside two minutes?
Jack Taylor: Correctly answered by OPE9

Well, what an afternoon! No, not in the football, but in Bristol where we spent the afternoon in the hospital! Not for anything serious I should add, but to make things easier when we go down again on later next week...at least in theory! Overall, for something that should have taken around an hour, we were in the hospital - or in a pokey little side room to be precise - for (wait for it!) five and a half hours!! I wont go too deeply into the details, however three hours plus waiting for one particular person didnt help, neither did the fact that the X-ray department closes at the weekend and we had to use the A&E one instead (another 45 minute wait!). So, whilst this should have been a light-hearted piece about the patient who had two volumes on his TV (mute and deafening!) and kept switching from Football Focus to some sort of opera singing, it ended up being a rant about the time spent around waiting, only to really be little better off at the end of it. Oh yes, we also had a two-hour round trip to get there and back and when we finally got to collect our daughter from her Gran's, she piped up, "I think Leeds lost again Dad!"...

...Sadly she was bloody right as well! The 1-0 home defeat at home to Spurs, combined with Portsmouth winning, leaves us five points adrift of safety, although that's effectively six due to the crummy goal difference. You would have bet on Robbie Keane netting the winner as well wouldn't you, although it was noticable that he didn't do his usual celebration against his old club - much like against Wolves a few weeks back! I like Keane hugely and was saddened when he left us, however ultimately his goal leaves us deep in the brown smelly stuff and after a spell around Xmas and New Year when it actually looked as though we could do a Houdini act, it now looks almost inevitable that we'll be down, especially considering that we still have to face the Big Three - all away from home! Of course, I'm assuming that LUFC will still even be in business by next season! Okay, end of depression! I'll try and be more upbeat tomorrow!

Sunday 11th January 2004
"I'm breaking through, I'm bending spoons, I'm keeping flowers in full bloom."(Song)

Before this season, who were Man Utd's opponents in the last goalless league match at Old Trafford?
Charlton - Final day of the 2001-2 season: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

A bit of a rarity today as I was `supporting` Chelsea! Nothing against opponents Leicester except that they are battling relegationw with us at the bottom and in truth I was delighted to see them hammered this afternoon, although the reality is that it could have been an even larger winning margin than 4-0. Unlike some I could mention, I've not taken on this mentality to detest Chelsea and all they stand for due to their unflux of money and their attempts to `buy the title`. Good luck to them I say! However, after a recent poor spell, isn't it rather ironic that they should produce such a good display having returned to the front pairing of Hasselbaink and Gudjohnsen which has served them so well in the past. Jimmy looked red hot today and I was willing him to grab his hat trick when he burst through just before half time, but it wasn't to be. As was mentioned on the radio during the other game today, Chelsea have actually done exceptionally well this season, it's only the consistantly amazing form of Man United and Arsenal which makes it look otherwise.

Due to circumstances beyond my control - and NOT involving Bristol or hospitals this time - I missed a large chunk of the Man Utd v Newcastle game, although I did get to hear most of it on the radio. From what I saw/heard, Newcastle fully deserved their point, although having since seen the brief highlights, not only were they unlucky not to get a penalty, but also the home side were unlucky to have a goal ruled out! It also further proved the sheer unpredictability of football as I, like many others, expected the usual annual goal fest when these two meet and it was to Newcastle's credit that it didn't happen. If they continue to defend like that, the goals will arrive at the other end against lesser opposition and we could yet see them in the Champions League again next season.

Monday 12th January 2004
"You and me, we used to be together, everyday together, always."(Song)

Who are the only nation to win the European Championships on a penalty shoot-out?
Czechoslavakia (1976): Correctly answered by Jaan Roos

I'm not a big fan of musicals, although I did see a children's performance of Annie last year which was superb, however in general I'll avoid them like the plague. With this in mind, you can understand why I'll stay well clear of the latest one that has just hit the theatre's in Argentina if it ever gets to the UK, especially as it's a celebration of the life and career of Diego Maradona! Yes, no kidding - Maradona the Musical is in full flow and apparently playing to full houses! Well forgive me for being a killjoy, but it's not for me, although I'd be interested to see how they do certain scenes - that goal against Greece in WC94, not to mention his subsequent dismissal from the tournament, or maybe they'll skip that part! Equally likely is that they'll skip the 51st minute of the WC86 QF against England when he handled the ball into the net! It'll be done in good grace I expect, stating that the score was 1-0 when he netted his superb second goal. If ever the phrase `Flawed Genius` fitted anyone, it's Maradona.

Another trip to Bristol today, although this time we had to be there by 8:30am. This wasn't a problem, although leaving early turned into a decent idea as we underestimated the sheer weight of the rush-hour traffic - it was horrendous!! It took us 40 minutes to get to the outskirts of the city which is about right, however it was another 45 minutes to do the final five miles to the hospital, which is very close to the city centre. The weather didn't help, although the storm we were promised at lunchtime thankfully never materialised, however it was only whilst waiting at a set of traffic lights that it occurred to me that many people do this sort of journey every day, or at least five times a week! They have my admiration at is would drive me round the twist! One day was bad enough, but to do it on a regular basis is crazy. Now, if only we had a half decent public transport system...

Tuesday 13th January 2004
"If you want to buy me flowers, just go ahead now. If you want to talk for hours, just go ahead now."(Song)
Two Princes - Spin Doctors: Correctly answered by Jaan Roos

Scott Parker once played six games on loan for which former Premiership club?
Norwich: Correctly answered by Ipswich fan (!!) Jeff Slater

I see that Chelsea have begun their transfer window purchases, or at least they would have had Charlton not been able to resist the lure of the Russian money. The bid for Scott Parker - who admittedly has had an excellent season - was firmly rebuffed by Charlton who stated that they didn't take too kindly to bids for any of their top players. Now admittedly, Charlton are desperate for the cash and are in a position where they can afford to reject such advances, however you have to admire their stance. They are fourth in the Prem after more than half the season and are in the very real position of qualifying for Europe which would boost the coffers on it's own merits. However, they are aware enough to realise that this task will be made that much harder by selling their top players and by resisting such offers as the one announced today, they are sending out a message that they are no longer a selling club and good for them for doing it! Of course, Chelsea seem to have an almost bottomless pit of money, so if the offer were increased, how long before the board overrule the manager?

Apparently experts are predicting that video tape will effectively be killed off by 2007 by DVD. I could well believe this and I'm sure we're not the only ones to have amassed a decent video collection over the past decade or so, only now to go out and buy the same film on DVD, whether it's for the extra's, the better sound and picture or whatever, and already we've got rid of some old videos as we simply don't watch them any more. Back in the 80s, VHS and Betamax went head-to-head in the video tape war after they both killed the Video 2000 format (anyone else remember those?). Ultimately VHS came out on top and became industry standard, leaving Betamax users with a white elephant. Twenty-odd years on and VHS is close to become another similar creature as DVD players get cheaper and cheaper and the recorders also plummet in price. I wonder though in the year 2030, when our kids are all grown up with kids of their own, if we are then lamenting the departure of DVD? Indeed, it may not even take that long!

Wednesday 14th January 2004
"Near a tree by the river there's a hole in the ground, where an old man of Arun goes around and around."(Song)

Which manager signed David Seaman for Arsenal in 1990?
George Graham: Correctly answered by Cheryl Warner

There can be few people surprised that David Seaman has decided to hang up his gloves early. Due to quit at the end of the season anyway, the 40-year old figured that his current shoulder injury would not heal quickly enough to warrant his availability for the rest of the campaign and that's fair enough. Naturally enough, after over 1,000 competitive games in his career, there are many articles looking back on the past two decades or so, but whilst his achievements, honours and great saves get a mention, so do the less honourable moments such as the Nayim goal in 1995, Ronaldinho in WC2002, that Macedonian corner from last year and his crazy decision to adopt a ponytail! Only partially joking about the last one, however I wonder in a few years time when people look back on his time at the top, whether he'll be remembered, like Shilton and Clemence, for the high points, or for the aforemetioned cock-ups. Sadly, it'll be a mixture of both which is a shame as you don't play that many games if you are a crap keeper.

Another drive to and from Bristol again today - the fifth (and the last!) in five days as my wife has been in hospital to undergo minor surgery. Whilst totally successful in all aspects, it has left her not able to put too much pressure on her left arm which in itself is not a major problem, although you'd be surprised how often the non-writing arm is used in everyday use, apart from getting in and out of the car. You see, in the UK, we still drive on the left which means that my wife can open the car door from the outside easily enough, but cannot shut in when she gets in and, more to the point, cannot open it again to get out! This afternoon, yours truly has been doing the honours, making me look like a glorified driver for royalty!! That said and joking and gripes aside, all credit to the nurses and surgeons at the BRI for their excellent care and expertise. Top quality, all of them!

Thursday 15th January 2004
"Okay, now girls. I want you to concentrate. Failure is not an option. And Bethany, if you feel the need to vomit up there, just swallow it. (Film)
Donnie Darko - Correctly answered by H.E.D

Which club won promotion to the top flight in 1990, but didn't play in the top division until THREE years later?
Swindon (relegated straight after promotion for financial irregularities): Correctly answered by Jaan Roos

So Northampton have incurred the wrath of the fans by doubling ticket prices for their FA Cup clash against Man United. Many are whining that it will cost United fans more to watch the game than at Old Trafford and that their opponents are taking advantage of the situation. Well of course they are and frankly I don't blame them in the slightest! What United fans need to remember is that there is life out of the top three of the Premiership and that many lower league clubs are living on or below the breadline. Northampton aren't going to host the likes of Man United in a competitive game on an annual basis unless they are very lucky, so you really can't blame them for squeezing every available penny out of this godsend. After all, many Prem clubs charge more when Man United and Arsenal visit than when Wolves or Leicester play so in that respect there's no difference and United fans are currently lucky enough to enjoy one of the lowest attendance fees in the top flight anyway, so lets have some perspective here. Yes Northampton are taking advantage and yes they are being exploitive, however if you were going to a concert, you'd expect to pay more to see Robbie Williams than Zoggy Poodlecrap - and this is the same in principal.

My local non-league side - Frome Town - are mid-table in their league, however despite blasting in goals for fun away from home, they have won just three games at home in the league since Nov 2002, prompting fears that the ground may be cursed! So, enter a local `white witch` who came to the ground ahead of Tuesday's cup game against local rivals Paulton Rovers and it appeared that all was going swimmingly with Frome 1-0 up. However, a second half recovery saw the visitors come from behind to win 2-1, leaving Titania Harrdie seemingly unable to lift the `curse`. Now, this story has been picked up by many local and national TV stations and has also alerted the national newspapers to it's `novelty value`. However, what they may not be aware of is a superb quote from a long standing fan who came into the shop where I work today and, spotting the story on the front page of the local paper, said, "If she was a witch, we should have burned her at the bloody stake!" Back to basics then I guess.

Friday 16th January 2004
"Never felt pleasure and pain like this. Something so right but it feels so terribly wrong. I keep holding on." (Song)

Which current Prem club have appeared in a total of nine FA Cup Finals and won eight of them?
Tottenham: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Although it's not confirmed at the time of typing, the Mirror is reporting today that a �35m package has been put together to get Leeds out of the mire ahead of Monday's deadline. Apparently, Sheikh Abdulrahman bin Mubarak al-Khalifa of Bahrain, who has been a Leeds fan since studying in England in his youth, has put together the deal which includes �15m to spend on new players. At the risk of tempting fate, lets assume it all goes ahead as planned and administration is avoided, whilst it's not am Abramovic-type takeover, it's still a substantial investment in a club in serious disarray on and off the pitch and will make the Sheikh some kind of folk hero among the fans, especially as he could have made a similar investment at a fraction of the price this time next week. What is needed then is an improvement in results, keeping the club in the top flight for another season, although this will not be easy especially considering recent results. However, the biggest challenge among all this is undoubtedly down to the faithful fans who follow the club week-in, week-out and how they are going to get a terrace chant incorporating the Sheikh's name!!

Isn't it odd how the brain stores the strangest, and often usless, pieces of info, long since forgotten or so you think! On one of the recent trips to Bristol, a particular song came on from the `Golden Year` of 1985 and I remembered buying it in my youth and absolutely loving it! The song itself is where Wednesday's lyric came from, however when it started, I found that although I'd not heard it in ages - years rather than months - I could recite almost all of the lyrics from verses and chorus. Quite why the brain should choose to retain this totally useless info whilst I struggle to recall what happened last week is beyond me, however it just goes to show that the human mind is a complex machine which has more info inside that we ourselves realise. Now, where the hell did I put that pen that I was using ten minutes ago??

Saturday 17th January 2004
"All the best women are married, all the handsome men are gay." (Song)
Love Supreme - Robbie Williams: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Whilst at Man United, David Beckham scored one own goal in a league match. Against which opponents?

Another game, another defeat, anothet step nearer the Nationwide league. Today's defeat at Southampton, whilst not totally surprising, did leave a taste of hope in the mouth as we apparently played well for large parts of the game and, having got back to 2-1, hit both post and crossbar in the latter stages. But, bad luck counts for nothing in football and it doesn't change the fact that we are now bottom. Yes, normally Wolves beating Man United would have given me a broad smile all across my chops, however it was tinged with the realisation that whilst it was the shock result of the season so far, it also rooted us firmly to bottom spot. I didnt see the Wolves game (only the second PPV game I've missed this season) as we'd arranged to go into Bath for the afternoon, but by all accounts, it was no fluke and Wolves deserved something from the game. But, if you think back to August when United won 1-0 at Old Trafford, then Wolves were unlucky not to earn a point from that one, so maybe eyebrows will be raised a little too quickly at what will be called a freak result.

Speaking of the Nationwide - Some astonishing results in division one today, not least at Portman Road where Ipswich beat Crewe 6-4 in one of those matches where defences went AWOL for 90 minutes, although as a further quirk of fate, eight of the goals were netted by Ipswich players at they score TWO own goals! Equally, at Rotherham, the home side shared eight goals with leaders Norwich in another amazing encounter. It didnt end there either as Crystal Palace won 5-1 at Watford, whilst Coventry, who lost boss Gary McAllister due to personal reasons, celebrated the appointment of new man at the top, Eric Black, with a 6-1 win at Walsall! Only one way to go now Mr Black!!

So how has your day been? Pretty good or plain crap? Well, whatever, spare a thought for Barnet's Christopher Plummer (didnt he used to be an actor?) who not only took part in their 4-2 home defeat against Dagenham & Redbridge but also scored an own goal. Not content with blotting his copybook once, he then got himself red carded near the end! Bad day indeed!

Sunday 18th January 2004
"Bands won't play no more, too much fighting on the dance floor." (Song)
Ghost Town - The Specials: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Who is the youngest player to have been sent off in a World Cup Finals match?
Rigobert Song (1994: Cameroon v Brazil): Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

So Arsenal regain top spot after winning at Aston Villa, but did they deserve it? Well, yes and no to be precise. Overall their general play was enough to warrant victory, although Villa were by no means out of it, however the controversial nature of the goals will doubtless be the subject of the back pages tomorrow. The free kick I felt was fair enough, indeed Leeds did it to Arsenal a couple of seasons ago at Highbury when we won 2-1. It's not the fault of the attacking side if the defence take ages to get their wall together and as long as the referee says that the kick can be taken, then fine. What would be helpful though is a general directive to make this a little clearer as different officials interpret this in differing ways. As for the penalty, it was harsh. Kanu did his usual twist and turn and simply ran into Mellberg as there was nowhere else to go. An indirect free kick for obstruction looked the obvious decision, but a penalty seemed a bit generous and Villa had every right to get cranky. It's been a good weekend for the Gunners and lady luck was certainly smiling on them today - maybe that title isn't quite wrapped up yet.

Chelsea, unlike Arsenal, will be lamenting what might have been after their goalless draw with Birmingham blew a great chance to make up ground on Man United. Birmingham were everything you expect from them - hard to break down, very hard working and occasionally dangerous whilst going forward. Chelsea will rue the effort from Gallas which was brilliantly cleared off the line by Tebily, however just before that, Robbie Savage missed what I felt was the best chance of the match. Maybe in May when Chelsea look at points dropped, they'll pinpoint this home game, however Birmingham (my outsiders for the FA Cup!) are no longer any mugs and, before too much longer should be turning their attention away from avoiding relegation and onto the possibility of a European spot. Steve Bruce has been there as a player and his experience could be invaluable should the Blues make it into the UEFA Cup.

Monday 19th January 2004
"I reached inside myself but found, nothing there to ease the pressure off my ever worrying mind." (Song)

During their brief Champions League spell last season (02-03) Michael Owen scored a hat trick away to which club?

What a contrast in fortunes eh? On the same day that Man United clinch a deal in principal (what does that mean?) to buy Louis Saha from Fulham for an overpriced �12m, Leeds are given an extra seven days to come up with a package to shovel us out of the financial situation we are stuck in. It's been no secret that Sir Alex Ferguson wanted a new striker who was eligible for the Champions League and whilst Saha is a decent player and quality finisher, they've done the same as they did with Rio Ferdinand and paid heavily over the odds, presumably to ensure that they are guaranteed his services. But why should we complain? After all, Fulham won't moan any more than Leeds did over Rio and United can afford the over the odds price, so what's the problem? It's very much the same as Chelsea in that the clubs have cash to burn and can almost go out and buy anyone they like at inflated prices, leaving the rest to look back, green with envy. Indeed for these clubs, they are left to fend for themselves and bring up their own youth players with a view to breaking into the first team, much the same as happened years ago and, to a lesser extent, even in the last decade. But what happens then? Simple, they are snapped up by the clubs with clout and money.

I'm sure I'm not the only one to experience the syndrome of `disappering wife` whilst waiting at the supermarket checkout! It happened again this morning whilst queuing at Safeways. Okay, it was only a quick top-up shop and we'd only been there around 10-15 minutes, however as soon as we get to the checkout and I start loading onto the conveyor belt, it happens! Off she goes to the furthest reaches of the shop with a parting message of, "I'm just going to get some of those (insert item here) that we saw!" Fine, but why not get some when we saw them? Instead I'm left sweating in case the cashier is quicker than expected, leaving me to explain to the rest of the queue why I'm not paying yet and leaving aforementioned wife to battle through the tail-end of the queue with two packets of French Fancy cakes. One of these days when it happens again, I'll wait for her to get back and say, "Oh, didnt they have the condoms you liked then?" Revenge will be sweet....!

Tuesday 20th January 2004
"I know that living with me baby was sometimes hard, but I'm willing to give it another try." (Song)
Nothing Compares To You - Sinead O'Connor: Correctly answered by Jeff Slater

Who lasted just 32 days as Man City manager in 1996?
Steve Coppell: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

The Final Insult! So blurted the back page of the early edition (the one we get here in the South West) of the Daily Mail today. It refers to Newcastle bidding �3m for Alan Smith....and Leeds accepting it! Naturally, at the time of writing, this is paper talk and heresay, however after the Harry Kewell saga in the summer and the fact that we need millions ASAP, then absolutely nothing can be ruled out as possible at the moment. Despite being Leeds born and bred, Smiffy remains one of our best assets, even though he appears more in the referee's notebook than on the scoresheet, and it would be seen as sacriligous to offload him simply to appease the money men. But then it could be argued that if he wasn't sold, then the future of the club as a whole is in doubt, so maybe it's not the final insult, but the ultimate sacrifice. Whatever happens, if he is sold, the team will be poorer because of it.

Speaking of Newcastle, their win over Fulham last night put them back within touching distance of a Champions League place and was a stunning example of how to make the most of set pieces. Fulham simply had no answer to Laurent Robert and Nol Solano whipping in corners and free kicks with pace and accurcy, causing chaos in defence and leading to two of the three goals. Many would argue that wingers and the art of crossing died out in the 70s and whilst that may be true in some respects, it certainly isn't where Newcastle are concerned. To me, they have an exceptionally potent attack, with the aforementioned pair providing service for Alan Shearer and anyone else who happens to be in the vacinity, as well as Robert's inclination to take the Roberto Carlos approach and shoot from anywhere, although his goal, whilst spectacular, is better described as unusual! So, Newcastle to finish fourth? It wouldn't surprise me in the slightest and hopefully then they can make up for their errors earlier this season in Europe!

Wednesday 21st January 2004
"You and I in a little toy shop. Buy a bag of balloons with the money we've got. Set them free at the break of dawn. 'Til one by one, they were gone." (Song)
99 Red Balloons - Nena: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Sheff United striker Paul Peschisolido is an international for which nation?
Canada: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

It would appear that Arsene Wenger has a big decision to make next week. Last night's `shock` home defeat to Middlesbrough in the Carling Cup wasn't as big a surprise as the scoreline suggests, especially when you see that the Gunners side was littered with fringe players and youngsters and the occasional first team semi-regular to keep the average age up! It would be unfair to Boro to concentrate on Arsenal fielding a weak side though as you can only play what's on the opposition and they did just that - and did it well! Juninho's goal was well taken and they were unlucky not to score on a couple of other occasions and whilst Boro didnt exactly dominated, how many saves did their keeper have to make from home attempts? Not many! So, what does Wenger do for the second leg? Go against his principal of giving the fringe players a run out and bring back the big guns, or stick to his plan and let the kids resolve what they began? My guess would be the former, although it would be refreshing if he gave the youngsters a further opportunity.

Next week, the third series of "I'm a celebrity, Get me out of here!" hits the TV screens and whilst it can make fascinating viewing, I do tend to try and avoid these `reality shows`. For those not in the know, the producers pay ten celebs (although I use that term VERY loosely) to live in the Australian jungle for what I think is two weeks and undergo various tasks which last year included eventually winner Phil Tufnell eating live bugs! One `celeb` is voted off by the public (although again I take some convincing that the vote isn't rigged to keep the more interesting ones on!) and we are eventually left with a winner. One of this year's contestants is model Jordan, whose ability to take her clothes off to reveal her more than ample bust is legendary. ITV must be rubbing their hands (sorry!) when she announced that if it gets too hot she'll have no qualms about stripping, although in truth, they can hardly use the catchline of "Jordan - as you've never seen her!" unless she actually keeps her kit on! I may try and watch some of it, if only for the antics of former Sex Pistol frontman Johnny Lydon, who never used to mince his words on the box and hopefully hasnt calmed with age!

Thursday 22nd January 2004
"I thought I saw a man brought to life. He was warm, he came around like he was dignified. He showed me what it was to cry." (Song)
Torn - Natalie Imbruglia: Correctly answered by Jinder Singh

Who was Bolton manager immediately before Sam Allardyce?
Colin Todd: Correctly answered by Jaan Roos

I've seen some cracking free kicks over the years - Gazza v Arsenal in 1991 springs to mind as does Roberto Carlos against France in 1997 and a few from a certain David Beckham, however Jay-Jay Okocha put himself right up with those last night with not one, but two brilliantly taken set pieces. His first came just two minutes in and curled over the wall and totally wrong-footed Villa keeper Thomas Sorensen, however his second, ten minutes from time, was the real eye-catcher! From the left edge of the area, he struck the ball with the outside of his boot with swerved viciously inside the near post! Ultimately it sealed a sensational 5-2 win for Bolton, putting them on the verge of the Carling Cup Final and was well deserved after an opening to the game which saw them three-up after 17 minutes and then, in the second half, they were brought back to 3-2 courtesy of a Villa goal where the scorer - Juan Pablo Angel - was offside THREE times in as many seconds during the build up! Barring a monumental screw-up, Bolton should reach the final and I'll be delighted to see them do just that. Nothing against Villa at all, but as one of the unfashionable clubs, Bolton are beginning to become more of a mid-table club than a yo-yo side as they were a few years ago and it's primarily down to Sam Allardyce. A cup final appearance, and victory, would be fair reward for him.

If any of our newspaper deliverers are ill, oversleep or simply don't turn up, it's down to the shop staff to get their rounds done, although invariably that means me. Today, one of our lads sprained his ankle, however as he rarely has any time off at all and usually ends up doing extra stuff for us, it meant a refresher course for me as I'd not done his round in ages. As always, it all comes back to you once in the area, however one house threw me totally! Bear in mind that this is 7am, pitch black and unlike the American movies where the paper is left in a box at the top of the drive, we have to go down to the front door and put the paper through the letterbox. Now, with no light, artificial or otherwise, I couldn't find this particular letterbox, not helped by the door being dark brown, so I ran my hands over the door trying to feel where it was. Ultimately I was like a cross between Marcel Marceaux and a teenage kid fumbling around in the dark and equally conscious that I was just as likely to find a doorbell and inadvertently press it, as I was the letterbox. Eventually, I conceded defeat and left the paper in the porch, which was not ideal but had no other option, only to discover later that...they don't have a letterbox in the door anyway!!

Friday 23rd January 2004
"And though the rain may fall - your father's calling you. You still feel safe inside. And though your ma's too proud - your brother's ignoring you. You still feel safe inside." (Song)
Good Tradition - Tanita Tikaram: Correctly answered by Jinder Singh

During his brief spell at Newcastle in 1999, Louis Saha scored just one league goal but against which club who've since been relegated?

So Louis Saha's move to Man United has gone through and the ex-Fulham star joins the Old Trafford ranks for �12.8m (of which Fulham receive �11.5m). I still maintain that they have paid well over the odds a la Rio Ferdinand, however that aside, will he be what United need? Undoubtedly he's a good finisher as he proved twice against Leeds last month and undoubtedly he'll get more chances at United as they are more likely to create than Fulham, although I daresay their fans would argue otherwise. Whether he's the world class striker that Fergie is looking for to partner Van Nistelrooy up front on a regular basis is open to question though and it would be my guess that whilst Saha will be used a lot this season, especially with Solskjaer injured, he could become a squad player next season as Fergie delves into the transfer market again in the summer. That's how I see Saha long term, as a stop gap for a few months, maybe slightly longer, but I genuinely don't believe that, even at �12m, Saha is the long term answer that United have been looking for. Mind you, if I'm right, he'll be the most expensive stop-gap in Prem history!

After a long afternoon yesterday, comprising largely of a double check-up at the hospital, we decided that neither of us could be bothered to cook after a 45 minute drive home so we stopped at a nearby Little Chef for a quiet bite to eat...or least that was the plan. To be fair, the food was fine as always, however there were two other families on tables adjecent to us and seperated only by vertical slats of wood. The first was a father, pregnant mother and their daughter aged about two, whilst the others were a mother and her two sons ages around six and eight. She spent most of the time on her mobile (although I shouldn't say much as mine went off half way through the meal!) to her husband whilst the younger of the boys had an irratating habit of staring at us through the wooden slats. His mother (middle class and she knew it!) did nothing, affirming my belief that these people couldn't give a stuff about others as long as their kids are fine. Then, on the rare occasions that she wasn't chatting to hubby, she decided to read an article from the paper to her kids - aloud! I am fairly tolerant most of the time, but I could see my wife's blood pressure rising, so in a bid to difuse the forthcoming explosion, I said to my wife, "Did you ever watch Jackanory when you were younger?" (I should explain that Jackanory was nothing more than a 20 minute programme of an adult reading a children's book aloud). Not only did this shut up Mrs Loud-Next-Table, which wasn't my intention, but it also reduced by wife to a fit of the giggles! However, the other ones on the nearby table (remember them?) did at least keep themselves to themselves, however their daughter had a rather unique way of letting them know if she didnt like something, whether it was food on her plate or a toy passed to her. Many kids would push it away or say `no`. Not this one! She let out an ear-spitting scream which only lasted for a second or two, but was repeated regularly until the offending item was thrown or taken from her sight! Again, there was no `please be quiet` request from said parents, who later let her run around the place like Zebedee on acid whilst they prepared to leave! (My kids are okay Jack, sod the rest!). Prior to that, with my wife (who had her back to this lot) still regaining her composure from my Jackanory quip, the two-year old proved that her feet weren't as well adjusted as her voicebox, by falling off her chair as she tried to stand on it, bringing the obvious, "Oh dear, did you fall?" question from her Dad! Unfortunetly, this incident (witnessed in full by me and my daughter) reduced me to the giggles which started my daughter and wife off again! Trust me, it's hard trying to eat an ice-cream waffle whilst trying to surpress a laughter fit!

Saturday 24th January 2004
"So she woke up, woke up from where she was, lying still, singing, `I gotta do something, about where we're going.`" (Song)

Who scored the winner in the last FA Cup Final to be played at Wembley?

Whether it's due to the early exit of Leeds or some other unknown reason, but I didnt quite get the feel of the `magic of the cup` for the FA Cup 4th round today. Normally I'd back the competition to the hilt as all the old cliches would come sprawling out, however the lack of any major shocks (no top flight club losing to a lower division side today, or maybe that's awaiting us tomorrow) and the absence of my own side saw me spend part of the afternoon on the GameCube with my daughter whereas normally I'd be glued to Soccer Saturday on Sky. The `magic` will doubtless return whether it's tomorrow or the next round, but with two of the big three through and the third likely to get past Northampton tomorrow, perhaps we need something like last season with two of the pair meeting and set up a titanic clash to enjoy - there, more cliches!

Speaking of the Big Three, I did watch Chelsea's game at Scarborough with hopes that they could become the first ever Prem casualty at the hands of non-league opponents, although realistically I knew it was as likely as Leeds winning the Champions League in 2006. Credit where credit is due, Scarborough restricted Chelsea to just the one goal and on a different day and a different referee, could have had a late penalty when the headlines could really have taken a different slant. As it was, it was all a pipedream of a game, notably for that non-penalty and some dreadful finishing from Chelsea with Gudjohnsen and Gronkjaer in particular guilty of wasting golden chances in the first half. Ultimately it's a financial saviour for the non-leaguers who can justifiably look back with pride on the day that they almost held their own against on of the best teams in the nation. As for us romantic neutrals, we can wonder about `What If` over that penalty.

One final word on the cup games for today - Birmingham! Yep, my outside tips are still there. Now watch them draw one of the big three on Monday!

Sunday 25th January 2004
"It was a theme she had on a scheme he had, told in a foreign land. To take life on earth to the second birth." (Song)

As regards last season (02-03) what do the follow clubs have in common - Spurs, Millwall, Norwich, Wolves and Watford?

For thirty-three minutes, the unlikely shock result looked a possibility as, despite Man United littering the Northampton goal with efforts, the ball simply wasn't going in. Diego Forlan missed an early penalty, or to be more precise, the keeper produced a lovely save, whilst David Bellion and Cristiano Ronaldo both missed sitters. Add to the mix a decent chance for Asamoah at the other end, which on another day may have bounced for him, and you suddenly wondered if it was going to be `one of those days` for United. Ultimately it wasn't to be as two scrappy goals and a tap in, all of which came from inside the six yard box, gave United the passage into round five, although their third division opponents did hit the woodwork twice. What's left was a predictable result, some great memories for Northampton who at least didnt concede eight this time (although they could have!) and the neutrals still awaiting the big shock result this season.

Today's other televised game came from the City of Manchester Stadium where Man City drew with Spurs 1-1. Bit of a strange one this as City totally dominated the first half whilst Spurs did similar for the second half until the final fifteen minutes when City woke up again. On which subject, the attendance for the game was 47,000 according to Sporting-Life, however the atmosphere on the box didnt come across at all! Maybe it was down to the acoustics at the new ground, however you had the impression that the crowd were busy getting over (or missing!) their Sunday roast and pint. Maine Road always seemed to create something rousing as regards atmosphere which doesnt seem to be the case at the new stadium and I wonder if this is anything to do with City's poor form of late which has seen just one win in sixteen games - and that away from home! One final point to note. Commentator John Motson went to great lengths to explain about the return to the side of Richard Dunne who has now played in the last ninteen games after failing to nail down a first team spot under Kevin Keegan - how many of those 19 have City won???

Monday 26th January 2004
"Whenever we needed money, we'd rob the airport. To us, it was better than Citibank." (Film)
Goodfellas: Correctly answered by Kirstymd

Which manager saw his team win the FA Cup and then get knocked out by a non-league side within the space of 17 months?
John Sillett (Coventry): Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Shame on me, but I've not really been following this situation at Man United as closely as perhaps I should be. As I understand it, two of the leading shareholders at the club are not happy about the way the club - and boss Sir Alex Ferguson - have conducted certain transfer dealings over recent years and that they are set to call an extraordinary general meeting if Ferguson is offered more than a one-year rolling contract as regards his position at the club. Maybe I'm missing something, but if they are trying to get shot of Ferguson, then in many ways they are biting one of the hands that is rather wealthily feeding them. I'm no fan of the club, however you have to stand up and applaud what Ferguson has achieved, especially over the last decade and if I were a supporter, I'd be thrilled to see him commit to the club until the day that his brain cells go! One of the pair, John Magnier, is apparently in a legal dispute with Ferguson over a racehorse, so you wonder if that animosity is spilling over into the football business, however if it comes down to the fans, there is likely to be no contest as regards where their loyalty lies.

I had concrete proof last night, if indeed it were needed, that much of what we were taught at school is relegated to the farthest reaches of the brain when it's thought to me no longer relevant. I took a quick look at my daughter's maths homework which was concentrating on weight and mass and the first two questions had me stumped to the point that I cheated and took a look on the Internet for the answers. "How many grams in a kilogram?" was the first and I guessed at 100, only to discover that I was only one zero out! The second, "How many kilograms in a metric tonne?" I must admit to not having a clue, although as it turned out, the answer was the same as the first question! Of course, what I'm really dreading is when she comes home with algebra homework as I never really got to grips with that when I was at school myself. I mean 4a +6b - (2c+4a) = 3(2b) - What does a, b and c equal? HELP!!! And then there's the possibility of Shakespeare for English essays of course. Not easy being a parent is it?

Tuesday 27th January 2004
"With one light on, in one room, I know you're up when I get home." (Song)
Hunter - Dido: Correctly answered by Matt Robbins

Complete the sequence for last season: 1999 - Newcastle: 2000 - Aston Villa: 2001 - Arsenal: 2002 - Chelsea: 2003 - ?
Southampton (Losing FA Cup Finalists): Correctly answered by Jaan Roos

Remember the FA Cup in 2000? I wouldnt be surprised if you didnt after an instantly forgetable final and one equally drab semi. Indeed the most notable thing about the tournament that year was that Man United pulled out to play in the ill-fated World Club Championships, although in truth they had their arms firmly twisted by the FA to do so due to England being in the running for the] hosting of WC2006 which ultimately went to Germany anyway. Many of us hoped that the WCC would die a death after that and after it was cancelled in 2001, however FIFA now want a competition next year and want to increase the participants from 12 to 16 teams! One simple question - Why?? They are the first to whine about too many games being played and how our top players are always knackered, yet they want to re-launch this competition just months after Euro 2004. Is it a ploy to make more money from the top clubs courtesy of TV revenue? Probably, however with a venue soon to be announced, it'll be interesting to see where it's held (assuming if it goes ahead) as the European TV audience are not likely to be thrilled at 9am or 11pm kick off times. Both Arsenal and Chelsea have spoken out against the competition and just for once, I agree with them both.

Doubtless we all have items which have some value in our homes. Whether it's purely worthless to outsiders, yet of immense sentimental value or whether it's genuinely worth a few quid, there is probably something which we would all rush to save in the event of a disaster. Spare a thought then for Scarborough goalkeeper Leigh Walker who played in what may be the biggest ever game of his career at the weekend against the moneybags of Chelsea and put in a display to be proud of. He was equally proud when he managed to swap shirts with counterpart Carlo Cudicini and get all the Chelsea squad to sign his shirt for him! Now, regardless of who you support, isn't that a stunning memory of a fantastic day for anyone? Sadly for 22-year old Leigh, his mum thought that the sight of a muddy shirt in her house was not ideal - and promptly shoved it in the washing machine. It came out sparkling, devoid of all the mud and grime.... and autographs! Now, isnt that ever a choker, although hopefully Chelsea and their players will resolve the situation for him!

Wednesday 28th January 2004
"It's the terror of knowing what this world is about. Watching some good friends screaming "let me out"." (Song)
Under Pressure - Queen and David Bowie: Correctly answered by Adrian Jobling

In 2000-1 season, which now retired striker played in all four divisions with Leicester, Norwich, Millwall and Barnet?
Tony Cottee: Correctly answered by Cheryl Warner

Bolton and Aston Villa have given us some great entertainment over the last seven days, culminating last night. The 5-2 match last week was a `Goal of the Month` tournament wrapped up in one game, however whilst yesterday's clash didnt have the rush of goals, it more than made up for in excitement and controversy. Villa's valliant attempts to pull back an unlikely deficit were edge of the seat stuff and despite wanting Bolton to go through, I really found myself rooting for Villa at times, especially late on after they'd got back to 5-4. Of course, the major talking point came earlier in the 39th minute with the sending off of Gavin McCann and I reckon that he has no-one to blame but himself, despite the accusations towards everyone else. Yes, his first yellow card was unlucky as he played the ball and the Bolton man (Ibrahim Ba?) did over-react, however as regards the challenge on the keeper which led to his dismissal, I reckon he would have got away with it, especially after the ref admitted that, as he pulled him away, he was still making up his mind whether to show a second yellow. Looking at it again, the ref showed no indication that he was reaching for a card...until McCann slapped Emerson Thome! Although it was no harder than Eric striking Ernie (No, not Sesame Street - I'm talking Morecambe and Wise), you cannot raise your hands and hit an opponent and get away with it and the straight red was justified, whereas I feel he would have stayed on, despite his challenge on the keeper who we all know are protected to the extent that you cannot breathe on them unless you've rinsed with a gallon of Listerine first! Equally, Villa boss David O'Leary was quick to blame the antics of Ivan Campo on `helping` to get McCann dismissed, however whilst I don't condone the waving of the imaginary card syndrome (in fact, it bloody annoys me), he only did that AFTER McCann started walking having struck Thome, thereby having little effect on the showing of the card. Before that, Campo simply resembled some kind of demented walking windmill with arms waving in all directions! Overall, just another typically English cup tie!

For the last week, us Brits have been told to prepare for `The Big Freeze` (copyright tabloid press) which only serves up memories of the Vicar of Dibley episode where they argue over the Great Freeze and the Great Frost, not to mention the Great Snow! However, I digress. Yesterday in certain Northern parts, the snow arrived and brought the areas to a standstill as usual, even though it's a fraction of the average daily fall in Canada. However, further down South and certainly here in Somerset, we've had nothing aside from a brief five-minute flurry yesterday which started and stopped by the time I finally managed to cross one of the busier roads in our town! According to the news earlier, this was due to the cold front and Arctic Wind taking an `unexpected course` and delaying our snowfall (much to the annoyance of all the kids that I speak to!). However, the DJ on the newsagents radio this morning mentioned that, as we can no longer trust the weather forcasters to get it right (you mean, we could in the past??), then he would do his own. So, if you've already had snow, you might get some more. If you've not had any snow yet, you might in the near future! End of forcast!

Thursday 29th January 2004
"Mary's got the same shoe size as Marilyn Monroe. Put her fingers in the imprints at Mann's Chinese Picture Show." (Song)
Stole - Kelly Rowland: Correctly answered by H.E.D

The 2002 Worthington Cup Final between Blackburn and Spurs saw which `first` in English Cup Finals?
First final to be played with the roof closed - however I'm also told that it saw a German (Ziege) score for the first time in a final: With thanks to Matt Robbins for that

After years of whining, it would seem that the Premiership (and the Nationwide?) are to get a winter break from next season on a two season trial, leading up, rather neatly I think, to WC2006. It needed a Swede to pursuade a group of other vegetables (well, Sven Goran Eriksson and the Prem chairmen) that it would be a good thing for the English national side and, hey presto, here we go. It's now down to the fixture whizz-kids to decide when to have it and, after this week has proved that snow and ice can arrive at anytime, the timing should be down to common sense and not weather orientated. My suggestion would be to have the final set of games on the weekend before Christmas (except when that falls on a weekend!) and then re-start again on the first spare weekend after New Year, giving the players, officials and fans a football free festive season to spend with families. Whether this will be the case remains to be seen, however whatever happens, someone will find something wrong with the idea as you cannot please all the people all the time. Just spare us from the five week break that happens in Germany though!

As you can see from the piccy on the left, I opened my big mouth a little too quickly yesterday! Yes, that is our dogs in our garden this morning, surrounded by the white slippery stuff which finally arrived early yesterday evening. It was really odd as well as we were driving across town to the ninth birthday party of our God-daughter in the pouring rain when it almost instantly turned into a nasty ten minute blizzard - and that was it! Rain turned to snow, the road and pavements resembled the Arctic Circle and we were half-way between our house and the party, wondering if we should use common sense and turn back before it got worse, or carry on as the worst was over! My idea to do the former was over-ruled by those-who-must-be-obeyed who wanted to go on! In truth, it all worked out okay, however had we stayed too much later at the party, then the snow would have turned to ice and we would have had problems....as proved this morning. I was out for around three hours delivering papers after a few of our deliverers couldnt make it and due to the fact that our town has more hills than the Swiss Alps, it was inevitable that they would be dangerous! This was the case with one near us which was eventually blocked by the police after a number of cars tried driving up and down it only to discover themselves caught up in some kind of vehicle version of figure skating, resulting in a few minor bumps. Positive proof that when they say, `Only drive if absolutely necessary.` then they do it for a good reason!

Friday 30th January 2004
"She's got a smile that it seems to me, reminds me of childhood memories where everything was as fresh as the bright blue sky." (Song)
Sweet Child Of Mine - Guns and Roses: Correctly answered by Jeff Slater

In 1995 which player moved from QPR to Newcastle for �6m and then two years later, moved to Spurs for the same fee?
Les Ferdinand: Correctly answered by Jaan Roos

With D-day number three, or is it four, up today for Leeds United, it would appear that the short term future of the club is at least out of danger. The wage deferral from the players yesterday has obviously helped, although why they didn't agree to it a week ago still wrangles among many supporters, whilst yet another potential rescue package is said to be on the cards today with a Yorkshire based consortium said to be interested, although frankly they could come from Mars and Jupiter for all I care, as long as they have the cash! Hopefully now, the club, players and fans can put all this on the back burner for the remainder of the season and concentrate on the main priority - getting out of the bottom three! Games against Middlesbrough and Wolves at home, then Villa away come in the next week and a half and we desperately in need at least two wins from those games to give us air before facing Man United and Liverpool by the end of next month. Yes, I'm still worried for our footballing fate, but it's now down to the players to prove that their worth on the pitch is equal to that off of it.

Apparently Taunton was `hit` by an earthquake yesterday morning, however we're not to panic as it barely registered anything on the Richter Scale above a stampede by a group of worker ants. However, for those not in the know, Taunton is the county town of Somerset and only around 45 minutes away from where I live which makes it a little more of a concern. Here in the UK, we are ultimately very lucky not to be struck by the more severe natural phenomenon - including earthquakes - however with Manchester struck by very minor tremors in recent years, you can only wonder if we do have a fault line somewhere under the nation, which whilst not on the scale of the San Andreas Fault, could still be building up for something bigger. That said, a customer in the shop today had a different reason for yesterday's quake. He said that his mother-in-law lives in Taunton and chances are she fell out of bed and caused the tremor!

Saturday 31st January 2004
"If there's nothing missing in my life then why do these tears come at night." (Song)
Lucky - Britney Spears: Correctly answered by Kirstymd

Which goalkeeping legend played his final international game on his 41st birthday during the 1986 World Cup?
Pat Jennings: Correctly answered by Jinder Singh

Just when you thought things couldn't get any worse.... So spoke Soccer Saturday anchorman Jeff Stelling as they `went over` to Elland Road shortly before full time to find out that Leeds were not only about to go 3-0 down at home to Middlesbrough, but that we'd also had keeper Paul Robinson sent off for a professional foul. Yes, just another ordinary matchday in the season of a Leeds fan which has gradually reduced us all to total resignation that we're on a one-way track to the first division. However, enough of this downheartedness and onto brighter things like today's live lunchtime game from Old Trafford. These Saturday lunchtime kick offs are a major pain as it means a mad rush home from work in time to see the start, but this was well worth it! Despite United winning and regaining top spot, Saints deserved a point at least and with a little more luck and better finishing, they would have had it. The game also marked the debut of Louis Saha who scored the opener (albeit via a massive deflection!) and made the second...and then faded into obscurity after half time! I still have my doubts that he's worth the huge fee paid for him and nothing I saw today has changed that opinion, but hey, what do I know, my side are currently propping up the rest!

Elsewhere today, Birmingham scored a late, late goal to earn a point against Newcastle whilst at the other end of the scoring spectrum, Bolton netted after just 24 seconds at Charlton to set up a victory and move into eighth place (Yes, really!). Fulham and Spurs shared first half penalties before the hosts scored a second half winner, whilst the Merseyside derby ended goalless at Anfield as did the relegation battle between Portsmouth and Wolves. The back page headlines may well go to Leicester goalkeeper Ian Walker though, who with his side level at half time at home to Aston Villa, conceded three goals in ten minutes after the break, sparking one fan to come onto the pitch and have a go at him. Walker apparently stood his ground and pushed the fan to the floor for which he deserved nothing but praise in my opinion as any fan who feels fit to set foot on the pitch deserves everything he gets. Chances are the fan will sue Walker and probably win! For the record, the game ended 5-0.

Quote of the Day 2: Sky's Martin Tyler, who I thought was going to have a real on-air argument with co-commentator Andy Gray over the legality of the Man United winner, stated earlier that it was good that the title wasn't a "two horse race" this season. However, with all the internal wrangling between Sir Alex Ferguson and the studs rights of his own horse, Tyler added with tongue-in-cheek, "I really shouldn't mention horses here should I."

Quote of the Day 3: A few good ones today with Charlie Nicholas coming up with a cracker whilst watching Pompey and Wolves struggling with gale force weather, stating, "Both clubs are having problems with wind today!" It comes to everyone at a certain age!

In a league of Wales game today, Rhyl beat Caernarfon 7-1! Nothing overly unusual about that, however last week, the same club beat Barry Town 8-0! I wonder if any are available to join Leeds? On a free transfer of course....and low starting wages!

Finally a quick mention to my Scottish team. Celtic beat Kilmarnock today to rack up their 21st league win in a row. A remarkable record in itself, although it does also say a lot about the quality of the SPL.

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